Author Archives: Suze

Half An Indecent Proposal And Foot Massage

Sam Bentley and Valentina LesbianI’ve recently found an interest in walking that has come as a bit of a surprise to me. I have always appreciated the countryside but never felt drawn to walk for mile after mile through it, especially at this time of year, winter has always been a time for me to wrap up warm with a hot drink and wait until the sun gets its act together and warm things up properly. I did have a set of walking boots but they’ve been uncomfortable on longer walks so I went out the other day to buy a new pair.

We live in the Peak District so the nearest town has plenty of stores selling outdoor gear. I’m not telling you where that is for a good reason, someone in this blog post would probably not welcome the attention they might get if you worked out who she was.

I took my boots with me but wore a pair of light trainers as I thought walking in in a pair of dirty, smelly hiking boots, trailing mud all over the place might not be very welcome. Even in a hiking store!

The first sales assistant to notice me was a young boy, barely out of school, I explained I needed a proper fitting to see if the boots I was wearing were the right ones for me. He immediately said I needed to speak to his manager. The manager in question turned out to be a woman around the same age as me with a black bob (obviously coloured but it suited her) and dark brown eyes. Yes, I noticed her looks immediately, so shoot me. It’s a while since I’ve written about this sort of thing on this blog and the little fact that I did find her immediately attractive is what inspired me to write this.

So, trying not to study her too intently I explained the issue with my current boots and she agreed I needed a fitting to see if I just needed new insoles or a different pair. I sat down and she removed the insoles from my boots and those from a pair of boots on the shelf that were one size larger. While she offered them up to the soles of my feet to compare size and shape I studied her. She was wearing one of the shop’s own brand outdoor tops, the ones you wear as one of your layers when walking to provide effective insulation. It clung to her shapely figure like a second skin. Especially as she wore nothing under it except a T shirt bra. I found myself wondering what her full breasts would look like underneath the top without a bra, especially with the cool air outside making her nipples hard. Which is when I started to get the unmistakeable tingle between my legs that tells me I’m getting full-on horny.

Thank goodness women don’t get erections like men do. I could feel the blood flooding to my groin and my pussy lips getting puffy and sensitive. If I had been a man I would have had a huge bulge in my jeans, what a giveaway.

Anyway I scolded myself for being so horny and lecherous, though only a little bit, and let her get on with it. It turns out the boots I have were too small and I needed the next size up. But while she was explaining this to me she was absently, obviously subconsciously stroking and caressing my foot along the sides and under the arch. Then she moved around the heel, across my ankle and up to my calf. All the time explaining about support and the best style of boot for me. I only heard half of what she said because I was so turned on by a cute stranger caressing my feet in such a public place.

I suddenly realised she had made a comment that required a response. “Sorry?” I asked. “You have very nice calves.” She repeated. “Do you do a lot of walking?” she asked. “Thanks.” I replied, “We’ve only just taken it up seriously. My husband always said I have nice legs.”

Then she raised her head and with a smile on her lips we locked eyes and just for a moment there seemed to be a moment of understanding between us that I can’t explain. It was there for just a couple of seconds, enough time for her to say “He’s a lucky man.”

“Thank you.” I blurted out, wanting to find out if she meant what I think she meant. But the moment was gone, she lowered her head, I think she blushed slightly and continued with the sale, taking the boots to the cash desk where her young assistant took payment. I bought the boots and left the shop in a bit of a daze.

Had she been coming on to me? Was she really that into feet too? I honestly don’t know if it was my mind joining the dots and getting it hopelessly wrong or not. Whatever actually happened I couldn’t shake the thought for ten minutes and had to sit in the car until I was back to normal again.

I drove home and awoke the next morning to a dream about her. As soon as Alex had left me in bed for my morning meditation I whipped out my clit vibe and masturbated myself to oblivion while imagining her and I in the shop changing room peeling off each other’s clothes before I rubbed her to a frantic clitoral climax with my foot and she then returned the favour with her hand on my pussy.

I Taste Myself

Sam and ValentinaKeying in the title of this post just brought about that naughty little number from a few years ago from the Divinyls..I Touch Myself.  Here’s the link if you haven’t heard it.

So you’re now on my wavelength.  😉

I love it when Alex goes down on me, over the years we have been together he has perfected his technique to such a fine art that I’m very close to being able to orgasm on his tongue.  I say close because as of yet it hasn’t happened and that’s not down to Alex’s lack of devotion to this endeavour.

It’s me.  I require a certain level of vibration/strokes just like with a clitoral vibrator for me to be able to let my juices flow to that degree.

So the elusive “Lingual Orgasm” hasn’t yet been achieved but Alex and I are striving to correct that as much as possible.  Has anyone reading this experienced this delightfully intimate act?  If so, do you have any advice which could aid our quest.

And of course when Alex raises his head from between my thighs to kiss me I get to enjoy the taste of my own juices.  I’m a bisexual girl and it’s a while since I went down on a girl, this takes me back to those days and brings a smile to my face.

Tasting myself during sex makes me even more passionate, the musky aroma of me simply turns me on.  Is this normal?  Are there any other ladies out there who enjoy the taste of their own nectar?

And Here’s To The Next 10 Years!

Girl In WIndowYes, it really is 10 years since the creation of this site.  Who would have thought that a need to share our thoughts and experiences on sex and sexuality would have lasted so long.

Because that’s exactly why was founded, out of a need to share our naughty thoughts and interests with the rest of the world.

And now 10 years later with a portfolio of 6 adult sites we are still going strong.

Over the years our blogs have taken us to adult shows in this country and Europe, to porn shoots, to manufacturers of adult products and everything between.

Both Alex and I have enjoyed the last 10 years of adventures in the big bad world of adult and intend to continue bringing entertaining and unique insights your way.

So thanks for your support over the years dear readers and “Cheers!”

Pinwheel Of Pleasure

On TopThose of you who have been reading this blog since its conception way back in 2005 will be acquainted with the fact that Alex and I like a bit of BDSM.  Not the hardcore, welts on the cheeks of the ass type play but a little sensory interaction.

One toy we haven’t tested over the years is the Pinwheel.  And that is quite simply because it doesn’t really appeal to either of us as a toy we would enjoy using on each other.  The very idea of someone sticking needles in to the tenderest white flesh on our bodies just doesn’t get our juices flowing.

But, never say never because there is one thing which remains constant in a sexual relationship.  The fact that nothing stays the same, as our love develops over the years so do our needs.  ;0

Furthermore, I was assured that Pinwheel play wasn’t for me in quite an unusual way.  Let me tell you how…

…Most of you will know this already but we lost our cat last June shortly after returning from the holiday of a lifetime in Canada.

Just a couple of days after having to make that terrible decision to put him out of his misery we decided to take a trip to the RSPCA cat shelter and check out the kittens.  Previously we have adopted cats from there, the black & white mature ones people don’t seem to want to adopt.

Having lost my father the previous Autumn and then the cat we just felt that it was time to have a little “new life” in the family and decided to adopt a kitten.

So we did…and little Jasper came home with us when he reached the grand old age of 12 weeks.  It was hard selecting him from a large litter and with his mum in the room next door.

After a few days of feeling at odds with the world he settled in to his new home which had been made escape proof as he couldn’t venture out of the house until he was 6 months old.  Hence Alex and I had a very, very hot indoors Summer with just one window which Alex had created an insertable grid for available for fresh air.

It was a very long Summer indeed.

A few weeks in to the new kitten’s stay with us he started to slip under the duvet with us for a cuddle.  I guessed he was missing the comfort of his fellow kittens or even his mum.  The late was confirmed when one morning I became aware of him nuzzling his head under the duvet between us.  Once settled with his head under my armpit and my hand resting on his chest he started to do the strangest thing.

Well, it was to me never having experienced a kitten in the house before.  He started to push his feet in to my armpit and simultaneously push his claws in to my skin.  OUCH!  This did not feel good but and I was on the verge of ousting him from under the duvet but I heard the most delightful sound…his deep throated purring.

This kitteh was content.  How could I stop him from feeling that way?

The simple answer is I couldn’t.

And now I have this behaviour most mornings around 5am.  It’s like someone running a Pinwheel up and down my armpit, it’s really not enjoyable in any way but I endure it just because I love the very bones of that kitteh.  J

What do you endure purely because you love your pet?

Button Flies

Kristina CrystalisWe had some good news last week so a lot of the tension that has been with us for several months has started to dissipate. That doesn’t mean we’re at a loose end, far from it. What it means is that we can get on with the things that we should have been doing but couldn’t because of the issues that were causing the stress. It’s not simply that they were taking up our time but they stop you expressing yourself spontaneously too.

Today Alex was fixing some of the plumbing in the new house and spent much of the day in the loft and standing on a ladder in the airing cupboard. One of the two loft hatches is in there and that one is right next to the water tanks so whenever I passed the open door I found myself talking to his crotch. After a couple of occasions I noticed the button flies on his old “work jeans” were popping open as one of the buttons has fallen off. Having such a dirty mind I quietly reached up and tugged open an extra button so I could slide my hand inside.

Alex asked “I hope that’s you Suze.” Who else would it be? I thought and grasped firmly hold of his cock. Alex didn’t object though I don’t know how much work was being done while I massaged his member until it was bulging against his jeans. I withdrew my hand. “Do you want a cuppa?” I asked. “Please.” He replied.

I heard Alex follow me into the kitchen a few minutes later. I was looking out of the window at the countryside behind our house when I felt him pressing me against the counter top. Alex slid his hands underneath my T shirt and in a well-practiced move roughly pushed my bra up until my nipples and areola were exposed to be firmly pinched between his thumbs and forefingers. I smiled to myself because the unexpected groping was made more sensuous by the uncharacteristic roughness of his hands caused by days of manual work. I bent forward over the work surface and felt his hands leave my hardened nipples on their way to unfasten my jeans.

Coarse skin abraded my soft belly and snagged on my panties when he unfastened the denim and yanked it down to my knees. My panties came next leaving my pulsing pussy lips open to the cool air. I knew what was coming next but because his flies were of the button variety there was no warning zipping sound before I felt Alex’s hard, hot erection pressing against my right buttock. His hand slid down past my exposed asshole leaving me wishing he had lingered and toyed with it for a moment. Fuck where did that thought come from? I was so horny because of the release of all that tension.

Ass play aside he began to rub his index and middle finger up and down my slit to liberate the well of slippery juices that was being generated. His coarse skin was unfamiliar and more exciting to feel than his usual office worker hands and of course he knew his way around me, and inside me. That was good but I knew what he wanted and what was coming next. He spread his legs wide to lower himself to the level of my waiting pussy and I lifted myself up and as far forward onto the deep counter top as I could until my face was almost pressing on the glass of the window.

Alex slid into me with practised ease until I felt the soft material of his old, worn jeans and the buttons of the flies pressing up against my buttocks. I groaned and moan instantly, again because of the lack of stress that accompanied this coupling. Shit it felt good to just be fucked in the kitchen in the middle of the day. I could feel Alex’s thick cock massaging my G-spot while my clit pressed against the hard, cold counter top and was filled with an amazing sense of ecstasy at the freedom of it all.

I came and kept on cumming until I heard myself squelching with every movement Alex made. I could imagine him grinning behind me and then I thought of the wet patch on his faded old jeans around the base of his cock. Fuck! That image alone made me cum again and slump on the counter top. I felt him pulsing inside me, I think Alex grunted too but mainly I was aware of his shaft throbbing with waves of cum flowing through it.

Just writing that made me smile.

What’s The Kink U Like?

Sex Toys For Your Valentine

Sex Toys For Your Valentine

Life in general and the adult biz in particular taught me one thing – you can never think you’ve seen it all because as soon as you think that something will pop up to surprise you.

Everyone has a kink, a fetish a predilection if you will and don’t let them tell you otherwise. So, what’s yours, pray tell?

I don’t mind if it’s one I’ve heard of before but it’ll be even better if it’s something new and really kinky. 😀

Licking Me Better

George Uhl eating Lexi Lou's PussySince Alex wrote his post about cock sucking the other day I thought I should write one about cunnilingus. Seems only fair, right?

Cunnilingus is something that I enjoy receiving and where possible giving too, but that’s another post altogether 😉 The problem is that not every partner you have is into licking pussy, fortunately for me that’s been rare. Aren’t I a lucky girl?

Just because you have a willing partner between your legs doesn’t mean the earth will move for you. In fact sometimes getting oral pleasure from your partner barely raises a smile. Here’s a tip for everyone with a female lover – we like attentiveness, listen to what we want and remember all us girls are not the same.

The usual joke about a man going down on a woman is that they can’t find the clitoris with a map and a full set of directions but I think that’s only a tiny portion of the story. In the search for the clitoris I think lots of men forget about the rest of the vulva. It’s a fascinating structure and I would advise all lovers to explore it with their partner as part of foreplay, I can’t imagine a more fun way to learn about female anatomy.

I’ll explain why I say this in terms of my experience and preferences because everybody is different in terms of the shape of their vulva and what gets their motor running. It also depends what mood I’m in as to whether I like licking, sucking, biting or probing.

OK, so a good lick of the clitoris is marvellous and will have me shaking all over although even Alex the partner who has been with me the longest hasn’t quite given me a clitoral orgasm with his tongue. His muscular tongue often has me teetering on the edge of blissful oblivion but frustratingly for us both never manages it 🙁 Licking, swirling, lapping and a gentle nibble all work on my clit especially when they are mixed together in a naughty cocktail of oral attention.

I like the feeling of a tongue lapping my lips too. First outside with long, slow motions that get more and more insistent until the tongue penetrates my outer lips (Labia Majora) and reaches the delicate and sensitive inner lips (Labia Minora) tucked away inside. By then I’m wet with his saliva and my own juices so it’s slick and flavoursome down there, pure essence of sex.

At this point Alex might start probing me with his tongue and dipping into the deep well of my vagina. It strains his tongue’s frenulum but that doesn’t seem to prevent him from trying to push his tongue as deep inside me as he can. I can’t imagine why the dirty, dirty boy!

Like I said earlier which of these different aspects of cunnilingus I enjoy depends upon my mood at the time so it’s essential that my lover responds to my body’s reaction to their actions. One day it can be sucking my labia, the next nibbling them, the next a full-on assault on my clit. Whatever it is I’m a very polite girl so I always say thank you nicely afterwards 😀

Getting Down To (Dirty) Business

Sam Shay SophiaWe arrived after another harrowing taxi journey to the eroFame show for the start of day two just after the gates opened.

Alex and I had spent the previous evening putting together our plan of attack.  As a general rule we don’t waste valuable time checking out stands we see no benefit business wise from visiting.  An exception to this rule are the main players in the field of adult pleasure such as Lelo, Jejoue and a few other leading brands.

Unlike previous years, Fun Factory didn’t have very much to bring to the floor in terms of “New” products.  Last year saw the release of their reciprocating vibrator, no such show gems this year.  L

In fact new products were far and few between.

There were quite a few “facsimilies” of established products on the floor which even infiltrated the key players in the field of sexual entertainment.  A new development which in some ways makes hypocrites of those who have filed suits against lesser companies for copyrite infringement.

All part of life’s rich tapestry in the adult world.  Lol

G-vibe had a new and improved version of the G-vibe which I’m still to test and some really cool looking lubricants, which again I’m yet to test.

But the product which stole the show and I will admit now I was going to bypass when I saw the stand…was the Womanizer.

I quickly viewed the stand and decided that it looked over hyped with its bejewelled and garish patterned toys.  And was about to walk away from it when a chap approached me and engaged me in conversation about the product.

He claimed that they guaranteed and orgasm or you had a money back guarantee.

At that point I was hooked!

As he went on to explain that the Womanizer worked on a contact less “air pressure” system.  I found myself becoming intrigued and wanting to whisk one of the overly blinged up products away for a quick memorable moment.  😉

How pleased was I when he offered to provide one for me to play with.

And in retrospect I’m so glad I stopped by the stand.  For years the Jimmy Jane Form 2 has held the prestigious accolade of being my “go to” orgasm device.  Now the Womanizer has knocked the JJF2 off that spot.

But more later…

Meeting Up With Adult Friends

Fetish Sex Toy ReviewsThat should actually read.  Meeting up with friends in the adult industry.  I’m talking eroFame here.  As I mentioned earlier, it has to be the largest B 2 B adult industry show in Europe.

Arriving as we did at the venue around lunch time it left very little time to concentrate our efforts on promoting our business and services.  So we decided to seek out people we currently work with and say “Hi”.

After all most of our clients are scattered across the world meaning we only get the opportunity to meet up at a couple of shows a year.

It was a busy first day and we managed to catch up with everyone briefly around potential customers on their stands.

Whilst strolling round I had my “Toydar” tuned in for any new products and I have to admit they were far and few between this year.  I had already been made aware of Lelo’s new Smart Beads as there was one winging its way to me from the Far East as I was at the show.

That would have to wait until I got home.

But the most intriguing toy was yet to come!  I didn’t discover that one until the last day of the show.  I’ll tell you more about it later.

When you have been involved in product testing for as long as I have, you start to have a very discerning eye.  And as a result can disregard many products at first glance.  For example, those who have blatantly copied another manufacturer, those which are damn right useless as anything other than a talking point and of course the ill-conceived idea.

One which immediately springs to mind as a complete miss in terms of price and function is an oversized, sander like vibrator which is both wieldy and noisy.  And its partner in crime a replica of an electronic screwdriver which makes your hand vibrate so fiercely I would worry about getting “vibration white finger”.

I can only assume that these products are truly “novelty items” as their usefulness as sexual pleasure objects is very questionable.

But hey!  It’s contributions to the adult toy market such as these which make for excellent PR even if for all the wrong reasons.  So hats off to them.  🙂

We didn’t stay for long as we were both tired from our early start and travel and left the hall for a rather Fast & Furious ride back to our hotel.  Seriously…does every taxi driver in Hannover drive like they are being pursued by the devil?  lol

eroFame, Five Years And Going Strong

eroFame 2014Since the first show way back in 2009 Alex and I have only missed one eroFame show.  It was the first to be held in its current venue the Messe showground in Hannover, Germany.

The show’s popularity has increased year upon year and it’s now the largest adult industry show of its kind in Europe.

This year we decided to attend all 3 days of the show, which runs from Wednesday through to Friday.  Flying back to the UK on the Saturday morning.

An early start was required to ensure that there would be enough left of the first day to take a wander around the show hall.  To be precise we had to rise at 2.30am to be at the airport for our 7am flight out to Hannover.

We attempted to go to bed at 7.30pm on Tuesday and get some rest.  We may as well have stayed awake because both of us had a problem with turning in at such an early hour.  It took me back to childhood, as that was the last time I retired to bed at that hour.  Lol

Regardless, we both dragged ourselves out of bed and made the flight on time.

A swift taxi ride (and I do mean a swift taxi ride) from the airport had us at our hotel in no time once we left the terminal.  I don’t know what it is about Hannover, or is it Germany in general?  But all the taxi drivers seem to drive like it’s the last time they’ll have to drive their Mercedes Benz.  No lie.

The Raddison Blu was clean and fresh with no frills, exactly what we like.  But FAILED when it came to in-room refreshments.  Yes, we know they need to make a profit by encouraging patrons out of their rooms to partake in their wares.  However, not supplying any tea and only two sachets of coffee on the beverage tray was a bit extreme.

If you were in to herbal tea then you were pretty much well catered for.  But we want caffeine in a morning FFS!  Lol

Anyway, enough of that…Oh and they didn’t have any English channels on the TV except news channels and forget it if you want to watch the BBC World.  Ok, I’ll get off my soapbox.

So we caught a taxi ride in to the fare once we had unpacked and freshened up.  Which meant we could take advantage of the rather splendid free buffet in the hall before strolling round.

Following a refuel of beef goulash and rice followed by a delicious mixed berry panna cotta we were ready to hit the floor running…

It’s That Naughty Time Of Year Again

Sexy PiratesI don’t know where this year has gone.  It’s been a busy but life changing year for both Alex and myself.

As some of you may be aware we took a trip of a lifetime in June and spent 15 glorious days touring Western Canada.  A trip we will remember for years to come for many reasons including returning to have to face the heart wrenching decision to have the cat we shared our lives with for 11 years put to sleep.

On the up side we adopted another cat from the RSPCA, this time a kitten.  Our previous cats had been 7 and 1 respectfully.  This time we were going to be parents to a kitten of just 12 weeks.  And oh how those weeks have flown by as he is now over 5 months old.

He’s not allowed out in to the big wide world until he is 6 months old, as advised by the RSPCA so we will have to place him in the cattery next month when we go on our annual trip to Hannover.

Yes, it’s eroFame time!  And it doesn’t seem to have been a year since our last trip in some ways but in others it does.

But, yes we are both looking forward to meeting up with trade colleagues and also meeting some new ones.  The event is the largest in Europe and attracts companies from around the globe, which makes it an excellent event for those wishing to find new clients.

As usual I will be posting here on the day’s events over the three days of the show, so watch this space for updates.  Oh, the show starts on the 8th October, so not long to go.

Eating Me Out In Bruges Or Should I Say, Eating Out In Bruge

Brugges MainThe hotel’s restaurant was in the cellar of the building opposite our hotel and had windows facing out on to the canal which runs between the two.

It was very posh and as we browsed the menu we both decided to opt for the set menu with a reasonable price tag.

The first course arrived after about 20 minutes.  I had selected the chicken liver pate.  Which looked lovely on the plate but totally impractical to eat because you only got 2 small pieces of Melba toast and a substantial chunk of pate.

Not wanting to waste any I completed it on bread roll out of the bread basket.  Waste not want not I was always taught.  Lol

The main arrived after what seemed like an over extended wait and again looked attractive running the length of the plate.  I had ordered the pork.  Which comprised of 3 x pieces of pork medallion, 3 x potato twizzler which looked just like those that Jamie Oliver featured and 3 x mange tout.

I sat for a while hoping for some accompanying vegetables to arrive but they didn’t.  That was it!

With the best will in the world there is no way you can make such food last.  A few scoops with the fork and it was gone.  Shame my hunger didn’t.  🙁

When the waitress appeared to remove my plate I asked if we could have out dessert without a wait as we wanted to take a look around the city whilst it was still light.  I don’t think she was too happy about it but hey I’m the customer.

I’m not sure why they were waiting so long between courses, there were only about 6 people including us in there.  I can only assume they thought the drinks bill would be higher if we sat waiting.  Well, it wasn’t.  lol

And then the dessert arrived which in the same vein as the previous two courses disappeared rapidly.

Only a couple of hours later both Alex and I had to eat some proper Bruges food…a lasagne from one of the local eateries.  🙂

Buggering About In Bruge

BrugeA couple of weekends back Alex and I had a first.  I know your naughty minds are conjuring up all sorts of naughty scenarios.  Well, just put them back in to your naughty corner.

We both have been chatting for a considerable time with a couple of lovely ladies in The Netherlands who kindly invited us over to visit some time.  And after consideration and a rather testing time with family we decided to take them up on their kind offer.

I know.  These people could have been anybody but our instincts told us they were good people and we could totally trust them to take us in and look after us during our stay.

However, the journey over to meet them was going to be a long one starting with the Eurotunnel and then on from Calais.   So on the way, as we would be passing anyway.  We decided to spend an evening in Bruge and drive on fresh and rested the following day.

The hotel was a very quaint one next to a quiet canal, very quaint looking from the pathway.   But once inside it was a Tardis.  The lobby was large and very bohemian with display cabinets around the walls featuring years of collectables whilst the middle was dominated by a bright and gregarious circular seat set around one of the columns supporting the ceiling.

Meanwhile the floor was laid to old flags with the odd Persian rug cast here and there.  And chandaliers dripped from the ceiling.  We were shown the dining room which was filled with the same elegance as the lobby with distressed Queen Ann legged chairs and tables, flower displays and oodles of shiny glass suspended from the ceiling.

Our room continued the opulence and grandeur of the lower floor, with rosewood furnishings and lots of drapes around the window.  And at the far end once the shutters were opened we had a perfect view of the canal.

There was a separate toilet next door to the bathroom.  Now, this is the bit which puzzled me and made the whole place even more quaint.  There was a full sized bath with overhead shower and a double sink but the strange thing was that we also had a bidet in this room.  Lol

I couldn’t help but chuckle and point out to Alex that I could imagine people waddling from the adjacent toilet in to the bathroom to place themselves on the bidet.  Not entirely a good thought but certainly an amusing one for a mind like mine.

Because of the late hour Alex and I removed our toiletries and nightwear from the case and left the room to head for our table at the hotel’s restaurant over the bridge on the other side of the canal.

I’ll tell you all about it next time…

Hump It Or Dump It?

Leaf Life VibratorI have so many products sent out to me for testing that every now and then I have to do a sex toy regroup and decide which products stay and which go.  And because of the limited space in my house I have to firstly dispose of “MK 1s”because they are the most obvious sacrificial sex toys I possess. By which I mean any original version of sex toys that have been superseded by newer designs.

Any successors are perfectly safe and stay in the toy box because they tend to retain the features of the original but also add to them. That makes which of those to throw away an easy decision.

The next choice to be made is, how effective was the product? Because I tend to retain the most effective items for obvious reasons. This can be the most expensive, but not always.

Then there’s the march of progress having an effect because as time goes by and adult toys improve the goal posts move so this is always in flux.

Which, incidentally, is another reason for me not marking on a 1-10 scale how good a product is because I would be constantly having to re-review previous toy reviews to keep them in line with current scoring.  A mission impossible. It’s like comparing a mobile phone of 1990 with one today, at the time they might have been the pinnacle of technology but in comparison with today’s models they can look primitive.

This time round I managed to dispose of 5 full bin liners of surplus sex toys.

These were loaded in to the back of the car along with other stuff from a garage clearout ready for the local council dump.

Given that there’s no designated area for “sex toys” I decided that they probably slotted in to the “General Waste” section.

We pulled in to the “dump-it” site the car being quite close to the areas of dumpage, a good position to start from.  Lol This means you don’t have to haul your rubbish over a car park and on towards your designated area.

Not that I really care because Alex being a gentleman was unloading the car while I waited inside. I was quite happy with this as it didn’t involve me being directly involved with the council employees and the risk of being “exposed” when they ask…

…”What have you got in your bags?”

I’m such a coward.  Lol. I know some sites open every single bag and rummage through the contents to ensure that recyclable waste is not being dumped in the “mixed waste” containers and that industrial or hazardous waste doesn’t get passed off as landfill.

It was easier to leave Alex and his cool composure to deal with that question.  I would have cracked, I’m no good with that kind of situation.  Hence me sitting in the car.

I held my breath as he unloaded the first bags from the boot of the car.  I then sat rigid in my seat as Alex continued to unload our weaponry.  With baited breath I sat relieved as each bag left the car seemingly unchallenged.

Then finally, Alex joined me in the car.

I asked him if he had been challenged regarding his “waste” and he said that one of the guys had asked him to open his bag during unloading.  Fortunately, this was one bag before the real payload.

Oooh, that was such a relief!


Breaking Balls

black-swimsuitI just returned from a week’s trip over to Cyprus.  It was part work and part holiday, fortunately more pleasure than business.

Alex and I had gone over with my stepmother to oversee some business relating to my late father and to tie up a few ends.  It also gave me the opportunity to see where in his later days he spent most of his time.

Which was a comfort as I haven’t visited the island for some years and had lost touch with all of his old haunts and friends.

It was great to see all of my father’s favourite places and of course provide support for my stepmother as she revisited the emotions she had encountered once already here in the UK.  I think we have now faced all of the mountains we have to climb and it’s now a question of building our stamina and getting on with life.

Staying in their apartment meant that Alex and I had to show a lot of restraint when it came to having a bit of nooky.  I think we managed 3 days before Alex felt like his balls were heavy and about to burst and I felt like someone had taken away my climax gland.  Lol

It was early morning and the apartment was quiet, although outside was noisy as people started their working days.  Cars zoomed up and down the street and people shouted their good mornings to each other.

I hope the background noise would be enough to mask the pure lust we both had for each other.  As Alex slipped between my legs the bed gave one of those familiar creaks, so I moved over to the middle.

He moved in closer, this time shrouded by silence and I blew a breath of relief.  I felt his hot, hard cock press urgently against my puffy labia majora and I opened my legs further allowing him to push into me.

Oh the relief of that first penetration!

I quivered a little as he filled me with his length and girth.  Coming to rest against what felt like my bloody cervix.  Fuck he was big this morning!

He sighed deeply and arousingly in to my left ear as he started to thrust, slow at first but then the control left him and he was giving me a good pummelling.  The bed started to once again grown, announcing to all listening that we were…


By now we were both beyond to point of control and I made the slightest of sideways movement to reposition and hopefully fool the bed in to silence once more.  And it worked.  😉

Now I had my legs wrapped around Alex’s waist and he was pushing deep and hard in to my hot, slippery cunt.  Closing my eyes I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, digging my nails firmly but gently in to his soft white flesh.

He moaned and started to buck like a possessed bull which had me gripping on for all I was worth.  My heart was beating so fast I could hear it and my pussy was pulsing with pleasure as my g-spot took onslaught after onslaught.

I could feel my pussy juice running between my butt cheeks as we both screwed each other senseless.  My head felt hazy and my senses alive.  It would have been wonderful to stay in that euphoric state for ever but it was not to be as I heard Alex give a deep but quite moan as he jettisoned his seed deep inside me.

Moments later he collapsed on top of me and we looked in to each other’s eyes with the same animal desire we had when we first met.

Good things cum to those who wait…

Canada Here We Come!

Nice Beaver

Nice Beaver

Losing my father towards the end of last year awoke something in me.  I decided that I was going to live life to the full.

He was taken from me at a relatively young age by today’s standards and didn’t even get time to enjoy his pension and retirement.  I was determined the same thing isn’t going to happen to me.  Things were going to happen before I reached my dotage.

So I decided to slip off to the travel agents and book the holiday of a lifetime (well, at least until the next one.  Lol).  I’ve booked a 15 day fly drive in the west of Canada.

It’s somewhere I’ve wanted to visit for years and I’m so excited to be making it happen.  Last year’s trip to NYC was fantastic, it’s a place I would love to return to one day but for me Canada has always been a dream.

I fly out in June and will be taking lots of pics so make sure you follow me on Instagram here and on my FaceBook page here.

And before you say it about the image. Yes, nice beaver isn’t it!

Sunday Morning Masturbation

hard nipplesI haven’t written about our sex lives for ages but events this morning made me realise I just had to let you know about some of the things we get up to. I know some of you like to read about what we get up to, but too often we are so busy enjoying ourselves and doing our sex toy reviews that we simply don’t get chance to tell you about it.

Like I said, what just happened made me realise I had to write to you about the marvellous way I was woken up this morning.

I woke to feel Alex’s hard cock pressed into the small of my back. He was moving slowly, grinding himself into me and I soon felt the slick wetness of precum lubricating the skin of his penis against the small of my back.

“What do you want?” I asked, teasing him. It was pretty obvious what he was after.

He mumbled something indistinct then “Suze, I love yourrngh.” He was still asleep and dreaming about me. I wanted to wake him and feel him inside me but didn’t want to spoil his Sunday lie-in so decided to pleasure myself instead. I was tingling at the thought of what pervy little dream Alex would be having about me because when he tells me about his dreams he usually surprises me with the devilish and ingenious sexual scenarios that his unconscious mind creates.

My pussy lips were buzzing with blood already making them swell. I moved my legs, gently so as not to disturb him and wake him from what was obviously an absorbing encounter with me because his hips had started to grind hard against my buttocks. My hand was between my lips and sliding easily because of the copious wetness my filthy mind’s thoughts were causing.

I rubbed my clit, again gently so Alex could enjoy his dream without interruption but I so wanted to frantically frig myself to orgasm! The tension between my desires and my consideration for the owner of the throbbing member rubbing against the skin of my back was unbearable. I was teetering on the edge of a climax but not quite there for minute after minute.

Then Alex’s hand slowly reached around and grasped my breast and crushed it with a grip that made me bite my lip so as not to cry out with discomfort. “Suuuuuze.” He moaned and began to cum!

His hot sticky seed squirted between us and was spread across my back and his stomach by his constant grinding. I could feel each jet making us wetter and stickier. That was it, I came with a groan that turned into a scream of joy.

We both became still and for a minute or so the bedroom was silent.

Then Alex realised he had just had a wet dream. “Oh hell, I’m sorry. I err.”

I put my wet fingers over my shoulder and under his nose “Don’t be sorry.” I said as he sniffed them. “Don’t be sorry at all. Though, you can wipe my back if you like.”

December Sex Toy Roundup

Njoy Fun Wand

Njoy Fun Wand

Historically the run up to Christmas tends to be quiet in the sex toy world with most manufacturers opting to wait until the first shows of the season like ANME in the US to reveal their latest wares.

This year, on Wednesday this week, Lelo will be launching a brand new toy which offers stimulation in a whole new way.  But I can’t tell you any more than this until they officially launch.

And guess who’s down to be one of the first UK reviewers to receive one of their new vibrators.  Yep, little old me and I can’t wait to give it a try having seen a video of it.  😉

I’m sure they won’t be the only adult toy manufacturers to reveal their latest products at the show and I’ll be keeping my eyes open on the industry news to ensure that you dear reader get to know what’s out there and just how good it is.

So for now all I can say is watch this space for updates and Sex Toys Buzz for the latest product reviews.

Things will be quiet on the adult show front until the end of the year now because Alex and I will be taking a long awaited break when the UK adult show is running in June.  So this year we won’t be in Birmingham but in Canada.

I’ll keep you posted on that too as we drive through some of the most spectacular countryside and mountains.  Make sure you follow me on Instagram and Twitter as @Redsuze for pictures and updates.

But for now can I remind you not to forget If you haven’t already joined the Sex Toys Buzz Newsletter you should, as well as getting the latest adult product news you can get your hands on FREE sex toys each month by signing up for the Sex Toys Buzz Newsletter and being part of the monthly giveaway draw. There is nothing to pay and no competition to enter, simply sign up and keep your fingers crossed that you are one of the lucky winners. Go and sign up now.

So here’s what we’ve been pleasuring ourselves with on the run up to Christmas.  😉

Butch Cassidy From Adrien Lastic

Tie & Tease Game 

Key Pyxis From Jopen

Fleshlight Lady Lager Masturbator

Revive Rabbit From Blush Novelties

2 From Adrien Lastic 


Post Christmas Recovery

Young Harlot Dropping PantiesHaving lost a close family member before Christmas took its toll in many ways which obviously manifested in the lack of updates here.  As you can all appreciate it’s difficult to keep up a sex blog when it’s difficult to keep it up!


But having taken some time out I have now find my blogging legs again and want to share with you all as I always have.

This blog was born out of sheer horniness which I wanted to share with you all.  My sex drive was so high that the overspill had to find a refuge and that was here on AlexSuze.  😉

Life takes its toll but also enriches us as a person and much as I have grown over the years so has this blog.

My thoughts for 2014 are that we take a deep breath are restore our thoughts to those naughty notes that you all enjoy.  And to do that I need to restore the “Me” that was taken by tragedy.

I would like to say a big thank you to all of you that hung on in there and had the faith to believe we would get this show back on the road.

In other news you should check out the completely revamped and inspired Sex Toys Buzz site which Alex has worked late in to the night on many days to bring to the fore.

So I wish you all a belated “Happy new year and a very naughty 2014”.

Too Much Of A Good Thing

Sam and ValentinaI seem to have spent the last 3 weeks eating out with friends, relatives and work acquaintances.  Oh, and the woman from gym whose friend thought I was gay.  Lol

You didn’t hear that one.  Ok, because you didn’t see the previous post about it I will recap for you.

Working from home means that your social circle is somewhat restricted because you don’t tend to meet many people during your working day.  In my case just the cat.

Therefore it’s a good thing if you can make new friends via social activities.  That’s where I fall short again because I don’t have many of those either.  But what I did do until recently because of late I’ve been a bad girl, is go to gym regularly.

It was whilst I was there one day I decided to turn an “Hello, how are you?” relationship in to a friendship.  One day I decided to ask the woman is she wanted to do lunch one day.  That was a good few months ago now and we meet regularly despite my tardiness with gym lately.

She hasn’t been much either.

So not only have I had lunch with her but several old friends and family members who I don’t see too often.

I’m sure this must have taken its toll on my waistline, so I resolve once again to get back in to that keep fit habit.

Having visited the gym on Tuesday and it’s now Friday I can say that I may take until at least Saturday to get rid of all the lactic acid which is currently making every muscle in my body tender.  Lol

See you there…