Monthly Archives: March 2008

I Finally Got Spitroasted!

Alex's Cloned CockI bet you can’t take your eyes off it can you? Well, perhaps some of you can depending on your sexual persuasion. Lol That beautiful masterpiece up there in the top left corner is the clone we made of Alex’s cock. Several of you had asked to see the reproduction, including our dear friend Rossco

Ever since Alex cloned his cock I have been patiently waiting for the compound to cure. It has been sitting in our office on the bookshelf teasing me, calling to me to try it out but I had to be patient. 😉

Today just after lunch we did a little writing in the office and the mini Alex caught my eye right in the middle of writing a post for this site. I stood up took it from the shelf and without a word to Alex who was sitting right beside me I wandered off in to the bedroom.

I slipped out of my blue jeans and black t-shirt, right down to my red lacey bra and panties which Alex bought from La Senza for me. You may have seen me modelling them in various images here on the site.

The panties were slid over my hips, down my legs and kicked them over to the wall. I stood the phallus on my bedside drawer whilst I retrieved the remote from Alex’s side of the bed and turned the television and DVD player on. Fortuitously, one of my favourite DVD’s was already in there from the night before, I pressed play.

I settled down on the mattress and took hold of the clone. It felt cold so I placed it between my thighs for a while to warm whilst I scooped my left breast from my bra and started to play. Alex was typing away on his keyboard I could hear him through the wall.

My nipple responded almost immediately and hardened under my fingertip. I began to roll the firm brownish pink nub around under my finger. My nerve endings began to fire and I arched my back slightly to meet my finger, pushing that erect nipple closer to its arouser.

My thighs were now pushed close, hugging that cloned cock as I watched the blonde taking her cock good and hard. The guy was mercilessly fucking her as she bent over the banister atop a very old Hugarian staircase.

The vibe was now warmed and I removed it from between my thighs. It was a perfect replica of Alex’s erect cock, complete with veins and frenulum…Mmmmm. I knew I needed lube, I was wet but would need assistance in taking this.

At that moment Alex stepped through the bedroom door. He saw me reaching over to the drawer. “You wanting lube, I’ll get it for you”, he kindly offered. I held out the clone vibrator and he applied a generous drop of water based lube to the tip. My index finger worked the lube around the tip of the clone.

Alex moved in next to me on the bed after removing his clothing. It was warm in the room and he was stark bollock naked, marvellous no clothing to hinder his ministrations. I could see him running his clenched hand up and down his cock as I pushed the cloned Alex inside me.

The lube felt cold as it touched my labia but it soon warmed and the vibe made its way inside me. It was a strange feeling of familiarity as it entered me, as if my pussy had been preprogramed with Alex’s exact shape and size. But one thing threw the sensation…this was the right size, shape and dimensions but it was hard. Alex is hard when he fucks me but not that hard, not latex hard.

It felt good though and it really filled my pussy. Alex stroked away. I flicked the button at the bottom and my pussy was full and resonating. Just knowing this vibe inside me was Alex was turning me on. I began to work the vibe in and out of my cunt, my grip becoming difficult as my juices flowed out of me.
Using my pc musles I held the vibe in place as I worked on my swollen clit. I began to massage my swollen bud with my middle right finger, I was so wet! Then I felt a tap on my right arm. It was Alex hitting me with his hard cock. Whilst I had been playing so had he and he was hard.

I raised to my knees, vibe still inside me and leant over Alex’s left hip, taking his cock in my right hand. He was hard, pulsating and hard, the kind of hard that looks as if it would hurt, skin close to tearing hard…

Opening my mouth I took all of him inside. I place my tongue against the back of his cock as I slipped between his open legs. Now poised and ready, I began to descend the length of his erection. Alex gasped.

His balls were tight, resting against his body and moving within the confines of their fleshy sack. I pushed my head downwards feeling his cock almost choke me as it pushed deep almost hitting my tonsils. Instinctively I opened my mouth drawing air. Alex now had his hands in my hair and was more than a little excited.

My hand moved back between my legs and started to move the vibe in and out of my hot and swollen folds. Alex held my head between his hands and began to gently fuck upwards in to my mouth. He knows just how far to go to avoid the auto gag reaction which initially impinges on giving a good blow job.

He continued and I held my throat open, pushing my tongue against the base of my moth keeping my airway free. His hands were now grasping two handfuls of hair at either side of my head as he fucked me like he meant business. My hand speeded up in time with his oral thrusting. I came, I was so turned on by his domineering presence, I came and couldn’t even tell him as I normally do. My mouth was full.

Would he know I just came from the throaty groans he just heard?

“Aghhhhhh!”

That was Alex. He was now fucking me quite deeply and I had to pull my head back to avoid gagging.

Then splat! The first spurt of come hit the back of my throat and I tried hard not to cough. Then I felt the luke warm trickle of seminal fluid running over my tongue and down my throat. His pace slowed and he let go of my hair. Muscles lost tension. Then his hands dropped from my head and I raised myself off his cock and swallowed the remainder of his cum.

As I lay back on the bed with the vibe still running in my pussy I felt Alex’s hand between my legs…

…The vibe started to work in and out of me…

Tags: clone-a-willy, dp, double penetration

Where Have All The Dildos Gone?

Yesterday evening I was in a tidying mode when I got back from work, it must be something to do with it being the first day of Spring tomorrow.

So after eating dinner I decided to go upstairs and pull the huge suitcase from under the bed. There are toys for all seasons and just about every year too. Lol Some of my rather large collection have been there for years and years.

In the last three years that Alex and I have been reviewing toys here, there have been major developments in toy functionality and styling. I recall the days when vibrators were straight up and down, bullet style ones. The most exotic model actually looked like a cock and was a revelation. I bought one of course! 😉

My collection now is so varied in shape, style and usage that some toys are almost unrecognisable as adult toys of pleasure. More something you could leave out on the coffee table without hesitation. Although I don’t think I will try it, both sets of parents are fairly clued up. Lol

The clearout also gave me the opportunity to completely remove any toy containing phthalates, which have been linked to birth defects when tested on rodents, and with damage to the liver and testes.

Despite the concerns and the pro active attitude most adult toy manufacturers have shown toward their eradication they are still used worldwide in the manufacture of everyday products ranging from nail polishes to, it’s claimed, Apple’s iPod and iPhone. You can read more about this here. The article specifically cites this Green Peace report with regard to the iPhone phthalates issue

I’m doing my best to have green sex…you know what I mean. 😉

You can see a video of my latest vibe, the Wave Vibrator from California Exotics here.

Tags: Phthalates, pthalates in adult toys, phthalates in sex toys, iPhones, phtalates in iPhones

Naughty Rock Chick

Suze
Thanks to Steve for prompting me to look at the images we have. There are hundreds of them just lurking on the hard drives. This is from a set I particularly like.

If you could see the look on Suze’s face … but she  made me crop that off the image. Hehehe.

Booby Galleries

AlexSuzeSteve commented the other day that he enjoyed the other day that he liked our occasional images. Well, for those of you who haven’t noticed we have a gallery area with a selection of our HNT images in it, here.

We have rather a lot of images that have never been used, so if I get chance I’ll put together another set and put them on as another gallery. I’ll let y’all know when they are up.

Until then enjoy the ones that are there.

And don’t forget our new video channel ASTV with all our videos and sex toy reviews.

Fucking Time For Summer

Suze Porn ClockWe made it through another winter, with no snow (well none to speak of) and quite mild weather this year. I suppose we have global warming to thank for that.

And tonight here in the UK we advance our clocks by one hour as we enter British Summer time. I just hope someone tells the weather gods. 🙂

But there is one thing I’m not happy about, we loose an hour in bed and you know just how much that means to me. On a positive note though, we should have an hours extra light to frolic in. 😉

I do hope that this Summer is better than last, the incessant rainfall and flooding made everyone very miserable.

I’ve given you all a Suze clock to brighten up your day. 😉

The Fetish Within

SuzeAlex and I have a very open and explorative relationship in sexual sense. As you should all be aware by now given that we share most aspects of our daily encounters and bedroom frolics.

However it wasn’t until I started to read his post Bound & Gagged that it struck me just how many of us have our little fetishes, perhaps we don’t even see them for what they are.

For example…raise your hand if you have ever asked your lover to give you sexual tasks or instruction. Again if you have ever participated in being tied or blindfold. I think that would just about make most people raise their hands to either one of those questions or both.

The thing is we don’t see these acts as being part of BDSM activity, it’s not all about inflicting pain and the pursuit of extreme torture. I feel there is more depth to it than that. It involves a great deal of mental and physical control, setting your lover specific tasks (duties) perhaps controlling their movement by restraints being applied…and yes a tie does qualify.

I find the psychological aspect of this the more pleasurable. It’s a huge turn on for me to be controlled by a dominant partner, for him to take total control of a situation. Alex may ask me to give him a blow job and swallow his cum. I will gladly and do that, knowing that it will please him and by return turn me on immensely because I know I am doing something that pleasures him.

So in that act alone I am submitting to him, becoming a submissive and he is dominating me…being a dom. I bet some of you hadn’t thought about it that way before. To a greater or lesser degree we all participate in some form of BDSM activity.

What really brought this to light was him mentioning my all time favourite film, Nine And A Half Weeks. I know that it isn’t particularly graphic, at least by today’s standards anyway but it is the most arousing film and a prime example of a BDSM relationship that has been watched the world over. I’m sure many people will pull it apart and judge it against contemporary films, but I saw it at a formative stage of my development and the impression will always stay with me.

Now tell me you’re not in to BDSM. 😉

Tags: BDSM, 9 1/2 Weeks, 9 and a half weeks

Bound And Gagged

If you say talk about BDSM to most people they would immediately assume that you’re talking about a physically restraint, a real set of shackles, rope cutting into flesh. That isn’t always the way of it. Real practitioners of BDSM will tell you that alongside the physical is the mental, at least as important and as you become more familiar with the scene the psychological aspect becomes paramount.

That’s not to say that we’re into BDSM, we’re pretty vanilla. However it struck me tonight that all real relationships have a form of BDSM in them. It’s the constraints placed upon you by the act of loving another person.

I’m devoted to Suze, sometimes this takes the form of doing things I know she likes, and at other times it involves doing and saying things that she will find uncomfortable or objectionable. I don’t like doing anything that will make her feel uncomfortable, but sometimes I know that I need to.

Take this as a truly perverse example. Suze is her own worst critic. It’s not that she’s lacking in confidence, but she’s always been one to doubt herself. It’s a good thing because it avoids you becoming conceited. Yet it can hold her back. She produces some great pieces of writing, reviews and stories, yet still she will not accept compliments from me about it. This isn’t a false humility, it’s genuine modesty.

The problem is I find it frustrating and when I see her doubting herself it can cause arguments because I want her to believe in herself far more than she does. Bringing such an argument on yourself is a source of great pain to me because not only is there conflict where there need not be, but also in a weird way my insistence that she acknowledges her own abilities is the source of the conflict.

I have to do it. I can’t stand to see her question herself when she doesn’t need to do so.

So I’m locked in a sort of masochistic embrace, wanting to make her recognise how much I respect her abilities and yet fighting against her innate modesty.

Like I said BDSM doesn’t have to involve whips and chains, masochism can be being a slave to love and having no choice but to be with someone who you love so much that you’ll do anything, even fall-out with them to make them understand how much you think of them.

You Want To Come In For A Coffee And…;)

The girls and I have hardly had the time to chat this week at work it’s been so busy. So this afternoon I tried to bring the conversation around to naughtiness for a bit of light relief.

Horny is a lovely lady, she is quite sensitive and sometimes a little less worldly wise than Busty and myself. I have taken it upon myself to slowly educate her. 😉

She was telling us about the guys she has met over the years and some of the things which have happened to her. For some strange reason she not only never seems to meet Mr Right but she also seems to attract arseholes.

One evening she was out with the girls and met this guy who bought her drinks all night and chatted away. Then when the end of the evening came and the lights were brought up rather than asking if he could see her again, taking her mobile number and promising to call her.

He said in an enquiring serious tone “Are we going back to yours then?”, almost as if she should sleep with him to pay him back. Horny said she asked him to wait there as she needed to go to the loo and made a quick exit. Lol

Another time she said that she was out and bumped in to the guy she had seen regularly in the wine bar. They chatted and got on like a house on fire. She said she wished they had talked before instead of just exchanging pleasantries.

Anyway, they spent all evening in each other’s company and towards the end of the night Horny who had driven down asked if he wanted a lift back to her house for a coffee. The guy agreed and said that he too had driven in to town.

They agreed that he should follow her back to her house. About half an hour later they were parking up their cars and entering the house. She asked if he wanted a coffee and he agreed.

Whilst the kettle boiled she went back in to the living room and he was sprawled out on her sofa clutching his chest. Visualise Busty and myself trying to hold back hysterical laughter because Horny was so serious when telling us.

“I asked if he was OK and he replied that he had pains in his chest and didn’t feel too well”. She asked if there was anything she could do and he said that he better get off home.

At that point she said she felt that something wasn’t quite right. “I didn’t want him kippering it in my living room”, she added with little sympathy showing this time. Busty and I let rip and burst in to fits of giggles.

“So you found a guy you were really interested in and he nearly collapses on your sofa, what do you do to them?”, I asked through the giggles.

“I didn’t do anything, he left and what’s more I never heard anything from him after. I bumped in to him a week later in the wine bar and he didn’t even acknowledge me.”, she laughed.

“If he didn’t want to come back, why the hell did he bother following me in the first place? He could have just driven home”.

We were puzzled and couldn’t offer any words of wisdom this time.

I told her that she attracts the dickheads. She agreed and told us that last weekend she was out and a guy told her he was a lorry driver and that she would make a great one. She said”I didn’t quite know how to respond to that, so I politely laughed”. He then told me that it wasn’t an easy life for female truckers as there are no facilities specifically for women to wash and brush up like they have for men.

“At that point I realised he was being serious and guess what Suze…I buggered off!”

There must be someone out there who is like Gene Hunt (who she is crazy about at the moment) that would like to go back with her for a coffee. And not feign illness or ask her to go trucking. Lol

Sex In The Morning

The longer days are becoming really noticeable now. Despite the frost on the cars on recent mornings spring is definitely here. If you don’t live at high latitudes you’ll not appreciate the difference the time of year makes to day length. In most of mainland UK it’s not as pronounced as in Scandinavian countries and to the North of the Artic Circle, but the large increase in daylight hours in the summer makes a dramatic change to people’s behaviour.

I find it easier to get up in a morning and seem to have more energy.

And on the subject of being up in a morning and having lots of energy … Yesterday morning I woke up with a monster tent pole. I rolled over to cuddle Suze before the alarm had chance to remind me it was a work day and poked her in the back with it. She woke from a light sleep with a pleasantly surprised “Oooh!”.

That’s a good start to a day. I slid inside her and we spooned for a few minutes, our hips gyrating against one another. We were warm and comfortable under the quilt, alone together, bodies and minds connected. Utter bliss.

The bedroom was bathed in a yellow glow from the intense sunlight streaming through the curtains. Time seemed to expand and the clock, which I expected to interrupt us at any moment with a jarring chirp, seemed reluctant to count the seconds.

Our bodies seemed to melt together, the physical boundaries defined by our skin disappearing and becoming irrelevant as we both approached a soft, prolonged climax. We experienced orgasms that seemed to extend out to infinity before us as we gently groaned our fulfilment.

Then we dozed off, for what might only have been a minute or so, our bodies still one until time accelerated again and the alarm clock heralded the return to normality. The world outside metaphorically tapping its wristwatch with a fixing me with its disapproving stare until I chose to emerge from my peaceful cocoon and make myself some breakfast.

The Perfect 10, Not Quite!

Carla Bruni and Louise PedersenAs I embark upon this post I know that is going to be a difficult one to compose. Sometimes don’t you find that you have an opinion, a point of view but you aren’t quite sure how to put that across to people.

I think this feeling is born out of the fact that I’m not quite sure myself as I commit text to page what exactly I’m trying to convey to you all. Doh!

Ok, here goes. For the first time today I looked up Nicolas Sarkozy’s wife on the Internet. The news footage I had managed to catch about them didn’t allow me to see his wife, Carla. I seemed to catch the back of her all the time.

So I did a Google image search for her because of all the hype currently surrounding them. Inferring that he prefers the film star lifestyle to the one of being president of France. I wanted to know who he had chosen to be his lifelong(?) partner and lover.

I typed the words Carla Bruni in to Google images, pressed return and eagerly waited for the images to start to display before me.

The one at the top of this post stood out amongst the others, some of which weren’t even of her. That’s me and her both, if you Google AlexSuze you get everyone else apart from us. Lol

I looked at endless pictures, I think in the hope that I would find that I too was attracted to this lady. But alas, I wasn’t I’m not sure quite why. She has the perfect sculptured facial shape, complete with full lips and pronounced cheek bones. But I find her eyes to be cold and hold no passion and the perfect combination of single facial aspects not to work as a whole.

It sounds as if I am over analysing this but I just can’t understand why the high scoring number of individual aspects of her face do not make an attractive whole. Could it be that her symmetry is not quite right? I’m not sure.

Louise PedersenBut if you compare her to Louise Pederson, who has the same sort of facial contours, they just seem to be aligned in a slightly more attractive way…at least to me.

I have to put this question to you all. Given Louise or Carla who would you say is the most attractive of the two?

Tags: Nicolas Sarkozy, Carla Bruni, Louise Pedersen

Screwing With A Conscience

With the threat of global warming destroying our planet and an ever increasing population, more and more of us are being mindful of the effect we are having on the world.

I decided to try and find some ethical solutions to our needs as sexual beings. Taking the pill and other hormone preparations eventually make their way in to the water; polluting it. In some cases changing the sex of fish and filling them full of oestrogen.

Therefore, condoms were my first thought. If you want to avoid the pitter-patter of little carbon footprints, you still need to use some protection.

The polyurethane ones don’t degrade and the latex ones can take years before they disappear back in to the soil. And with latex you have to consider the impact farming latex has on the plantations and the wages paid to the workers on them.

This site offers condoms Fair Deal Trade condoms guaranteeing that there products are produced without exploitation of the workers These condoms are made from FSC certified rubber and carry the BSI kitemark. So you can screw knowing that nobody is being screwed in the production of your condoms. 😉

The only biodegradeable condom I could find is the Naturalamb condom found here which is made from a natural membrane. Although it didn’t explain exactly what this membrane was made from, could it be lambs intestine? I’m not sure.

It must be noted that whilst these condoms are coated in a natural lubricant, they do not protect against sexually transmitted diseases. They are also good for people who have an allergy to latex like me.

There are lots of herbal based lubricants out there and other natural products I could have spent hours browsing but then I wouldn’t have been able to create this post for you. 🙂

Hetero-Sexual

SuzeOver the past couple of days Suze has got me thinking. Which women do I actually find attractive? Or perhaps more specifically what type of woman do I find attractive?

It has to be women of course, because I’m straight. It would be nice to put myself in the position of being able to choose men I would sleep with but while I can appreciate a charming/well-groomed/intelligent/sexy guy for what they are I can’t apply the feelings that arise from the innate attraction that I have towards women.

When I look at or meet a woman the whole of my brain is active in deciding if I find her attractive. The emotional, intellectual and physical all play a part to dictate whether or not she pushes the right buttons for me. With a man I can understand why women might find an individual attractive because of his looks, mind or whatever, but I can’t feel the attraction.

That’s the problem with being heterosexual I suppose. It would be so easy to try and work it out, but then it would be an intellectual exercise and attraction is not a wholly intellectual thing. If it were we’d have no need for dating sites. You’d just feed your characteristics into a computer and find your perfect match instantly.

So I’m stuck with women LOL. Well I’d have to say that with a few exceptions I’d be fighting over the women Suze likes. I like a woman with character and strength, I don’t suffer the helpless damsel act, it makes me want to wretch. That doesn’t mean I have a problem with submissive women because they know what they want, to feel the hand of a dominant partner. What I do have a problem with is directionless girlyness.

Because of a series of rather unfortunate and life-changing events over the last couple of weeks, lusting after women has not been at the forefront of my mind. There is no list ladies I’m lusting after.

So if I were to have to choose a woman as the object of my desire I’d only have one answer at the moment.

Suze.

How Much Sex Can You Handle?

We’re nearly three years old here at AlexSuze.com. We look back every year and see fewer and fewer of the blogs who were around when we started up. It’s a shame because the adult blogging world has lost some real characters.

There are however a few of the original crowd still around.

The first one that springs to mind is Anastasia of Sexualité. Her site was originally on Blogger and is now hosted on her own domain as a TypePad blog. She has started and been involved in a number of projects over the years, culminating recently in the launch of the online Erotic publication Lucrezia Magazine. Ana is one the most prolific and industrious bloggers we’ve ever encountered. We’re honoured to count her as a friend.

The of course there’s DH of DH Spicy. Now hosted here, we first encountered DH’s blog about adult blogs when we noticed our name on his site during a vanity search. One of the most memorable moments in the last three years was a chatroom party hosted by DH involving participants from around the world. Some of us were up very late and others up very early to be there but we’ve never encountered anything quite like it since. Thanks DH! We’re glad to see you’re back blogging after a short break.

There are other names that occur to me, the inimitable Dzer, Madame X. Then I’m at a loss. There are a few blogs of 12, 18 or even 24 months old, but of those that we “knew” well all seem to have faded away.

I suppose I should ask, if you still read us and were around three years ago, drop us a line. If you aren’t quite that old but I’ve left you out, then likewise pop a comment below.

Three years is a long time to be writing about sex, perhaps it’s affected my memory.

Getting Fruity With Louise

Yesterday I appealed to our readers to help me find the lady behind the DKNY Delicious perfume campaign.

I had searched the Internet to no avail.

Then over night a commenter simply known as Ana informed me that she is called Louise Pedersen. Thanks Ana, I would have been puzzling over this until I found her.

So, tonight when I got home from work I decided to look her up and here are a few details about the lovely Louise:

She is Danish from Skjern
Her height is 5′ 9″ (just a little taller than me 😉 )
Natural hair colour light brown
Blue eyes
Unfortunately she is a little young for me being only 27, however if she fancied an older woman I’m available 😉

I don’t know about you but I could watch this clip all day…

Tags: Louise Pedersen, DKNY, DKNY Be Delicious, Be Delicious

Pull It And Fuck Me

Suze
I love the drive to and from work it gives me time to sit quietly and think or sometimes listen to the radio absent mindedley as I shrug off the days tensions. It’s also a place where I quite often become inspired to write a post on this site.Today was no exception. I was driving home and checked myself in the mirror catching site of my ponytail behind my head briefly.

It didn’t really occur to me just how much of a role my long locks actually plays in my bedroom capers. For example I love to tie it back as I did today in a ponytail and feel it flick as I deliberately over accentuate my head movement.

And when Alex and I are fucking and I’m riding his cock, I love the feel of the hair bouncing trying to free itself from the confines of my hairband. With each downward thrust it hits me between the shoulder blades just like a keratin whip and then bounces back in to position for the next.

When my hair is down I look slightly wild and dangerous! 😉 It feels good laying against the flesh on my back when Alex is taking me doggy style. It’s like a caress, hugging my shoulders and upper back. The twist is that it can also gently tickle too.

I’m letting you in to a secret here but I like to look back over my shoulder as Alex is fucking away at my pussy. Looking through tussled locks of hair as it falls over my eye can look so sexy, don’t you think?

Then when we are both spent and I lay back on my pillow I like my mane to fan out over my pillow in a rather romantic and sexy way.

Last but not least I love Alex to gather up a handful of my hair when he is fucking me and gently pull on it, taking command of me, making me his. Using my hair like a bridal as he pushes deep inside me. 😉

I now know when despite many thoughts to the contrary, especially when it needs to be disentangled, I have kept it long. Short is practical but not as much fun.

Inverted Domestic Discipline

As long-time readers will know Suze and I are in a vanilla relationship. Like many vanilla couples we dabble in bondage and very mild domination, but it is the spice to our sex life, not the core of it. You’ll also be aware that we are open to any form of consensual sexual practice so often read gay, lesbian, TV, BDSM, D/s and sites of all flavours attempting to understand why others choose to follow paths that differ from our own.

So today while I was washing-up after dinner I started to consider what it means to be in a relationship that is based around a master slave relationship that extends beyond the bedroom.

Maid service is something that I’ve read about, heard of and seen depicted in images of dungeons and BDSM play. That’s not what I’m talking about, though it may be related and if so I’d be grateful if a practitioner would enlighten me as to their personal views on this. What I found myself wondering about is the dynamic of relationships where one partner is apparently submissive in every aspect of their daily lives.

This is where the washing-up came in. To me tidying up is a very good stress reliever. In contrast to most adolescents I used to want to tidy up, especially during times of teenage angst. It made me feel better and in control of my environment. Perversely there were also times when my room was a complete mess and anyone entering it would have thought I’d just been burgled. However tidying up was a way of exerting my influence over the physical world around me and regaining my composure without having to think through a problem that might be perplexing me. Being too close to a problem, feeling hurt or betrayed and all this probably fuelled by a huge overdose of male hormones often meant that feeling that I had overcome the initial anxiety without recourse to lengthy and often inconclusive intellectualisation of a situation was the best possible solution.

That makes me sound OCD doesn’t it? Well I’m not. I can be as disorganised and lacking in structure as anyone else. What I did begin to conceive, rightly or wrongly is that in some instances at least an apparently submissive partner, attentive to their dominant counterpart’s every need, might actually be the one applying the greatest control.

I’ve often heard it expressed that the submissive partner relinquishes control of their destiny to the Master or Mistress in the sure and certain knowledge that the dominant partner will not abuse that trust. Whatever they (the Dom) subject the sub to they will always exercise a level of self control sufficient to take the sub and themselves to the headspace they both desire without permanent harm to either of them.

Without that trust no relationship can work and in a relationship based on exploring the boundaries of experience total, unquestionable trust has to be its foundation. That said, consider this. In a situation where a Dom orders a slave to carry out a task, be that a specific duty, or general service around the home is it not in a strange way the submissive partner who assumes control. It may be their desire to serve, yet by serving and ensuring by whatever means necessary the dominant partner’s orders are carried out diligently the sub is in a way exercising total control. Control and discipline of both themselves as sub, but ultimately of their master/mistress by fulfilling the dominant partner’s raison detre?

Tags: BDSM, domestic discipline