Monthly Archives: April 2010

Sexy Nurses, Stockings And Sucking

La Corsetry La FemmeWe’ve been sent some new releases from one of Europe’s most respected producers of adult movies and I’ve reviewed one of them over on Himdulgence.

La Corsetry La Femme is a classy atmospheric piece of pornography that stands out from most offerings available because it tries to be a little different and regard sex as more than just fucking.

You can read my full review of the DVD here.

As I said we have some more Viv Thomas DVDs awaiting review so keep ‘em peeled so you don’t miss out on what’s hot and what’s not …

Flesh And Fucking Over The Counter

Jennifer EllisonI was doing a bit of research recently, no really it was research. I decided to get a copy of one of the lads mags to see what sort of thing your average male was reading in the print media these days. It’s too easy to take it for granted that you know what is going on in the big wide world and what appeals to readers, so I try and keep abreast of things – oh, no missus!

Well, you should have seen the look I got from the woman in the supermarket. You’d have thought I’d bought “donkey buggerers monthly”. It’s only a laddish, softcore tits and arse mag I thought.

So I suspect I’ll be getting funny looks from now on when I buy my groceries.

You can imagine her thoughts … “Filthy man” … if only she knew. ROFLMAO

Keeping Her Moist

Wet T Shirt In ShowerLaying in bed, gasping for a drink after a hot hard sex session (that was quite alliterative I out to write headlines for the red tops) it occurred to me to see if you could buy drinks that were specifically formulated to help you in the bedroom.

My initial thoughts were for beverages that would re-hydrate, that being the though on my mind as I lay there perspiring slightly and feeling like my mouth had been dried with a blowtorch. Off I trotted to the font of all knowledge, Google, and first of all stumbled across a few news stories from 2007 about a drink called “Turn On”. Apparently the drink was already banned in many countries by the date of the articles. It contained a mixture of all the usual herbs and wotnot usually associated with sexual performance, plus caffeine.

The problem with this as with some other (non-sexual) herbal remedies is that they contain a mixture of ingredients, many of which have not been tested individually, let alone in combination. Some of the herbs used in remedies can be quite strong and have the potential to cause side effects in people with specific medical conditions. I’m not taking a pop at herbal medicine here, but buying something that falls between the cracks when it comes to testing because you think it will boost your sexual performance is ill-advised.

Searching for drinks that re-hydrate you after sex came up a bit of a blank though. The nearest I got was this which isn’t quite what I was after. I was hoping for something that would promise to replace lost salts and minerals expended and depleted during a good hard shag.

So sadly I’ll have to stick to stick with good old fashioned water, or one of those nice expensive athlete’s drinks.

Pierced And Sexy?

Corset PiercingI am not a fan of piercings, in fact too many is a real turn-off for me.

So why is it that I’m becoming increasingly drawn to images of certain piercings. Specifically corset piercings. I know that part of the answer is that I like all things that lace-up particularly women’s clothing. But I think it’s the unusualness of this kind of body modification and its links with BDSM that are attracting me more a the moment.

I like things that are provocative and make you want to wince, yet draw your eye at the same time. Doesn’t everyone?

So to see skin laced together like this and know the tension it places the wearer’s tissues under and the procedure they have to undergo to achieve it … it’s both Ow! And Wow!

I’m definitely getting kinkier with age.

Sharing You Girlfriend’s Porn

Red PVC FetishThings are getting increasingly surreal around here at the moment. The more I think about it the more I realise how far from most people’s reality we actually are.

Strangely bringing home the copy of the lads mag was greeted by “Is it any good then?” from Suze, rather than the “You filthy bastard, aren’t I good enough for you!” that many women might be expected to exclaim. Then was my first project this evening – write a quick application to automatically resize some images we received to make them more easily manageable.

As you can imagine the images are not landscapes, but acres of bare flesh.

Like I said, surreal.

And it’s amazing the way we’ve slipped into this way of living. We’ve made conscious decision about the sort of stuff we get up to in the adult world, yes, but we didn’t set out to be surrounded by sex toys, containers full of lube and adult DVDs.

Life, as they say, is something that happens while you’re trying to do other stuff. Though quite frankly it’s not working out too badly at the moment.

First Time Porn

PornographyMy first experience of porn was a tattered shred of an old Fiesta, or Knave magazine found in the fields behind my primary school. I assume it had been stashed there by the older kids as a full magazine and never retrieved for one reason or another. The faded colour picture of a hairy muffed naked woman was the most erotic thing I’d seen up until that point.

My second experience of porn was finding my father’s porn collection in our loft when I went up there to build our immense model railway. Far higher quality, Penthouse and Mayfair don’t you know. Oh, and a copy of Razzle in the bottom of the box, LOL.

Leafing through those mags taught me more about the female anatomy than any school sex-ed lesson. It also introduced me to the tingling sensation that would eventually lead to regular erections and then to masturbation.

Because of the era in which those magazines were photographed a few stylistic points stuck which I’ve realised formed a significant part of what I find sexually arousing when I see a woman in a sexual context. The early/mid eighties date of the publications means I have a thing for curly hair, late summer afternoon sunlight, the occasional leg warmer and ankle/waist jewellery. Yes, high heels, stockings and suspenders too but all men love them, don’t they?

Yes there are certain little details that are guaranteed to get me going and they are, on the whole, a direct consequence of the images that accompanied my first excited fumblings.

Bring that forward to today, apply it to a kid of the same age taking their first steps into sexual arousal and I get a bit worried. No longer is it necessary to dig around in the back of wardrobes for visual stimulation or buy a tattered copy of a magazine, complete with dubious stains, from an older schoolmate. The Internet provides anything and everything.

Of course much of it is quite unrealistic. That’s fine if you have the life experience to know that most girls don’t do anal on a first date with two guys they’ve only just met and don’t have huge boobs and no body fat. But if you’ve never seen a girl naked, let alone explored her body, you could be forgiven for thinking that the insertion of a huge butt plug in her ass was the perfect start to foreplay.

It makes it all the more important that we ensure we teach our kids about sex in the context of relationships and wider social interaction. They need to understand that sex has to involve restraint, empathy and understanding. Not talking about sex to kids or telling them that they shouldn’t have sex until they are married in a society where marriage has become the exception rather than the rule is naïve at best, cynical at worst and will only lead to more dysfunctional realationships.

Glove Fetish

Sexy GlovesEvery industry is suffering at the moment and if your industry has been in decline for a while the recession is a source of even more pain. One such industry is glove making. I’m not talking about mass-produced gloves here, but the very specialist, fitted and finely crafted gloves that have always been the province of the well-heeled.

Gloves are an item of clothing that transcends the utilitarian and into the decorative and sensual. Hence their erotic overtones and for some the passion that they inspire in the form of a philia or fetish.

I think that’s justification enough for the government to give out grants to all glove fetishists, who by their purchasing of gloves and glove related, erm services, would help keep thousands of skilled artisans in work. Don’t you?


Suze Likes It Big And Hard

SuzeI think there ought to be a new standard for measuring the size of hard disk drives.


Well we bought a couple of huge disks last year to ensure we had enough space to back up all the files we have for all the sites. On the box it says “holds up to xxxx thousand audio tracks”. Fat lot of use that is to me. I hardly hold any music on my disk, it’s mainly html, php and JavaScript, data backups and lots of naughty pictures.

So I suggest that we need a new measure as Megabyte, Gigabyte and Terabyte the Pornabyte. Just how could it be related to the contents of the disk. Would one Pornabyte equal, one high res image? Or maybe one minute of hardcore video.

Any suggestions.

BTW this did occur to me on the way home with the two one terabyte drives in the boot, it just resurfaced now as I noticed Suze looking at some images of some very naughty girls.

Big Boobs In Shiny PVC, Bliss

CageIt’s image like this that make me happy. Not the cage bit, not for us, but if that’s what make syou happy, fine. No it’s the gorgeous brunette in her very shiny, very naughty dress that floats my boat.

I wonder who got to shine her up before this shoot?

Anyway, I’m looking forward to going back to Berlin this year and seeing all the naughty ladies there too.

Amanda Holden Ride Him Cowgirl!

Amanda HoldenAmusingly I wrote this piece earlier today and then while browsing the magic T’internet  later on found this story on the Metro.

I’ve got two things to say about this. First, if you read my earlier piece you’ll realise how it underlines how to play the media and raise your profile using risqué sex without having a huge fall from grace. Second, been there, done that, but was the one wearing cowboy boots and stood naked in the middle of a field …

This is a brilliant piece of PR for Amanda Holden. On the one hand she is portrayed as a game girl with a devlish, fun streak who will get jiggy in the open air in slightly kinky gear. On the other hand she married the bloke, so it wasn’t “casual”. It wasn’t too kinky as she was out in the boots anyway, it’s not like she turned up wearing pink boots PVC bra and hot pants … hold that thought. They were in the woods too, so it’s kind of “back to nature” and they weren’t about to be spotted, apart from by inquisitive squirrels.

The cynic in me asks if this story is true are not. The rest of me wants it to be. Not so I can imagine Amanda Holden having sex in cowboy boots, but to prove that you can be in the public eye and have naughty sex.

Famous People Having Sex

Fur CoatDo famous people have more sex?

Well I think that used to be the case. Glamorous personas seem to attract fans, groupies, hangers on … whatever you want to cal them rock bands were legendary for casual sex and occasionally bizarre sexual practices. Is it still the case though?

Despite some celebrities seeming to become more infantile by the day the rise of celebrity culture means that each of them has a responsibility to maintain a certain level of behavioural standards. I don’t mean they feel the need to set an example, that old fashioned notion doesn’t seem to occur to most of them. What I’m talking about here is that they walk a fine line between being a rabble rouser, with all the column inches it generates, and getting themselves “disgraced”. What amounts to a disgrace depends on the country you are in and the newspapers/other media’s attitude towards drinking, drug taking and sexuality.

So when it comes to ensuring your career is successful but not punctuated by a meteoric downfall celebs do have a bit of a problem. Perhaps that’s why they need publicists. But what has brought about all this musing about celebrity sexuality? Well Gordon Brown actually.

Today the Prime Minister got caught out because he was wearing a radio microphone from Sky News and made some less than favourable comments about a voter he had just been talking too. Whereas to the voter’s face he was apparently polite and amenable, afterwards he referred to her, amongst other things, “a bigot”. Our PM is developing a reputation for a Janus like personality and this seems to confirm it.

However he’s not the only person to do so. All celebrities have to be careful about what they admit to. How many actors spent years avoiding questions about their sexuality long after homosexuality was decriminalised in the UK? Changing the law is one thing, changing prejudiced minds is something much more difficult.

It’s not just the general public’s attitudes towards gay and bisexual people. There’s the UK’s ability to simultaneously hold the two beliefs that BDSM is both a bit of a laugh – a suitable subject for smutty innuendo – and worth of persecution by the criminal justice system.

What should a celebrity admit to or come out as being? One coming out as gay might be seen as brave and positive, the next “you’re no longer a suitable role model for such and such a group”.

If people were forced to show their true attitudes towards sexuality publicly so that prejudices could be challenged we might be able to get rid of the myths and bigotry that plagues anyone with anything outside what is generally regarded as a “normal” sex life. As it is we’ll have to put up with it, especially when someone’s career depends on them pretending to be something they are not. You can tell I’m getting sick of the election.

This is of course one of the reasons we keep ourselves to ourselves, shun publicity and don’t do identifiable pictures. Even what we we do, which is no more than many other adult do in their bedroom (apart from the running multiple adult sites and being the UK’s most prolific testers of sex toys) means that we have to stay anonymous. Otherwise our ability to be so candid would be compromised – I mean, imagine the scandal, what would the neighbours say?

A Fuck A Day…

AssAlex and I have a wonderful bedroom relationship which has improved immensely since we started writing this blog and sharing with all of our readers.  And of course the regular testing and reviewing of new toys keeps things lively.

In fact I can’t imagine a world where we don’t engage in sex at lease once a day.  I probably take it for granted now, whereas to some it would probably be a novelty to get down and dirty once a day.

I’m reminded just how lucky I am when I read stories like the one I just read.  Sarah Kavanagh decided to give her husband a special 12th anniversary of their first date present.  She wanted to give him a the present of her every day for a month.

As I read I was thinking, there would probably be a book deal along with the story just like the last time I read about a couple doing something like this.  There wasn’t and her account of the month which followed makes for interesting reading, you can catch the full story here–did-marriage.html

Enjoying Your Ejaculation

CumThousands of me will breath a sign of relief tomorrow as a new pill to counteract premature ejaculation becomes available.

Up until now there hasn’t been a prescribed drug available on the market to combat the problem.  Men have had to resort to delay creams and sprays which work by numbing the man’s penis, therefore delaying their ejaculation.

The drug known as Priligy will be available to buy and doesn’t come cheap (no pun intended) but for those suffering the effects of premature ejaculation it will be well worth considering.

You can read the full story over here.

Always Anal

Spanked Arse TattooI just read a quick story on The Sun’s site regarding absurd tattoos and what were the people thinking when they had them done. To be quite honest, looking at the images they have as examples you have to ask “were they sober at the time?” Because if you were in your right mind you just wouldn’t.

Aviva Yael had put together a collection of the strangest tattoos in a book called “No Regrets: The Best, Worst & Most #$%*ing Ridiculous Tattoos Ever. The book has according the paper become a global sensation.

But I think the most amusing aspect of this feature is that they used the image above and only commented about the tattooed hand on the right cheek.

When I actually was drawn to the string of love beads emblazoned on her lower back. Lol Did they notice these and were unable to mention them? What do you think?

Porn And Politics

Two GirlsDuring the expenses scandal that engulf the UK parliament last year one of the expenses claimed was by a female member of parliament – her husband had been watching adult channels via their satellite subscription and the extra charges were then claimed by the MP. That was very early on in the  debacle, which still rumbles on.

Tonight we turned that on its head. Because we are quite frankly fed up of hearing about the up-coming election we watched a porn DVD instead of our nightly fix of news. The one in question is a Viv Thomas title, the full review for which will be appearing on one of our other sites, or very soon.

Perhaps everyone should try this. It certainly helps you take a step away from the interminable election coverage, clears the mind and of course gets you horny.

Flicking Her Bean and Bashing Your Bishop

BJWhat is it some people have against masturbation? The myths that have grown up around it based on no evidence whatsoever have made people feel guilty about having a bit of fun for years, probably centuries.

Unless taken to extremes masturbation can be just one aspect of a healthy and fulfilling sex life. And I’m talking to men and women here.

For those of us who do enjoy masturbation within a relationship it’s easy to find a balance between the occasional bout of manual stimulation and the rest of our sexual gratification. When you are in a relationship of course masturbation doesn’t have to be a solo affair. In fact it’s more fun with your partner and even more so if they are the one who is doing it to you.

I’m not going to go into why there are some very weird and archaic attitudes towards self gratification, maybe later perhaps in another post, what I will say is this; Masturbation is fun and even if you just do it solo, with your own hand the occasional bit of self pleasure is not something to be guilty about.

Furthermore, there are so many aids available to make masturbation more pleasurable that investigating it can be a real voyage of discovery for you and anyone else who might want to join in with you. Women have their sex toys and now men have an increasing number of products which expand the masturbatory possibilities beyond the simple orgasm.

Masturbation creams like Stroke 29 allow you to masturbate as long as you like with less risk of injuring your precious palm pall – alright your cock. Until I’d tried them out I would not have believed how much fun they can be.

if you want to feel something other than your hand around your penis you can buy masturbators from the cheap and simple like the Monkey Spanker to the more expensive models like the Fleshlight Ice which I reviewed on Sex Toys Buzz recently.

And if you want to take male masturbation to its ultimate conclusion you can combine male sex toys with prostate stimulation using a toy like the Naught Boy prostate vibrator.

And if you’re out and about shopping for sex toys you can read all our reviews on Sex Toys Buzz on the STB mobile site (tag as sex toy reviews on your mobile device)

Sexual Mind Of The Pack

WolfI like to study human behaviour I find it extremely interesting, particularly that of the male.  He tends to be more primitive in his behaviour than the female.  What do I mean by that?  Well, most males whether they care to admit it or not do things to secure a sexual partner or in some cases simply for sexual gratification.  This behaviour of course is in relation to social interaction with the opposite sex.

Recently I have been interacting a lot on social networking sites and as you may well expect given my previous observations, the majority of my friends are male.  This is by no means a conscious decision by me in that I only accept males, I would say that the number of males who approach me as opposed to females is about 97%.

Then I ask myself why?  Most probably because I like to flirt and involve them in my adult sites.  This may be putting the females off, I don’t really know as I also promote sex toys.

And a small proportion of the guys on there want to private message for sexual gratification, which is fine once for a bit of fun but tedious when all they want to do is interact behind the scenes for there own pleasure.  Then it becomes boring and makes me wonder if I should charge.  Lol

More recently I have noticed a social etiquette within the males I associate with.  If one guy starts to reciprocate and flirt back with me the others stand aside and don’t join in.  Almost as if waiting turn.  Tell me guys is this an unspoken rule amongst you that you give the guy a chance and take a side seat if he seems to be getting somewhere?

I told you I was interested in human behaviour but it does make you analyse situations perhaps a little too much.  What do you think?

Sexy Angels And Fucking Daemons

Daemon GirlIt’s tradition in the western world to associate aspects of the human personality with good or evil. Whether you regard the good and evil at play here as the result of external forces or as an inherent part of the human psyche is irrelevant, what matters is that some forms of behaviour are regarded as good and some evil, or at least bad.

In most cases the majority of right-thinking individuals would agree what is good/bad, virtuous/evil. Murder, theft etc are obvious candidates for the evil tag and kindness, compassion and the like as traits that would be thought of as good and desirable.

The aspect of human behaviour that is too often associated with the darker side of the human condition is sex and sexuality. The reasons have their roots in the need for the ruling classes to find new ways to control those serving them. In some ancient societies sex and sexuality were celebrated and a source of joy and yet in each case subsequent regimes and philosophies have marked their predecessors as depraved and degenerate.

One of the most recent examples of this was the advent of national socialism in Germany in the 1930s. The previous Weimar Republic was denounced as corrupt and decadent (morally and sexually) by the Nazis who attributed it with the economic woes of the German nation after the first world  war. Yet what followed was what is generally regarded as one of the most inhuman and vile regimes ever to take power in Europe.

Looking further back and perhaps with more relevance directly to sexuality the civilisations of Egypt, Rome and Babylon have all been depicted as evil, at least in part because they embraced sex and the joy which can be derived from sex. Yes these societies all had reprehensible aspects, especially when viewed through our modern eyes, but despite many centuries criticisms made of them by civilisations that succeeded them still colour our views of sexuality.

In Egypt at one point the Pharaoh would masturbate every morning symbolically re-creating the universe as his supposed god-ancestor had done. In Rome pagan festivals celebrated fertility and procreation, Lupercalia being the most well know which has been watered down  over two millennia and adopted as Valentine’s Day.

Anal sex too has been condemned as an intrinsically evil act because of its association with the residents of a certain town next to the Dead Sea.

In every case it seems that there is no logical reason to condemn a sexual practice (so long as the partners consent and are not blood relatives) except to use that condemnation as part of a propaganda campaign against a former enemy or regime.

Sodom may have been a pretty nasty place when Lot saw it, but buggery was probably the least of its problems. More likely it was a lawless and cruel society like many in the world at that time. The anal sex just got co-opted as a shorthand for deviance and lack of morals.

Egypt was cruel and oppressive to many of those who lived there, and the ruling classes did interbreed. In fact that may have contributed to their downfall. However cracking one off is not evil in itself.

And as for you people running around the streets of Rome getting excited and spreading their wild oats … that didn’t bring down the empire, the impossibility of managing the largest civilisation in the world for 600 years did that.

If you want to think of us all as inhabited by angels and daemons then fine. However those little putti wearing halos or horns are not evil just part of a mixture of what makes us human.