Monthly Archives: April 2011

Hot Hostess

Red HostessI knew there was something that I’d forgotten to get from the shop – Melons!

Dirty Girls Over The Counter

Jennifer EllisonI was doing a bit of research recently, no really it was research. I decided to get a copy of one of the lads mags to see what sort of thing your average male was reading in the print media these days. It’s too easy to take it for granted that you know what is going on in the big wide world and what appeals to readers, so I try and keep abreast of things – oh, no missus!

Well, you should have seen the look I got from the woman in the supermarket. You’d have thought I’d bought “donkey buggerers monthly”. It’s only a laddish, softcore tits and arse mag I thought.

So I suspect I’ll be getting funny looks from now on when I buy my groceries.

You can imagine her thoughts … “Filthy man” … if only she knew. ROFLMAO

Corsets The Hard Way

Corset PiercingI am not a fan of piercings, in fact too many is a real turn-off for me.

So why is it that I’m becoming increasingly drawn to images of certain piercings. Specifically corset piercings. I know that part of the answer is that I like all things that lace-up particularly women’s clothing. But I think it’s the unusualness of this kind of body modification and its links with BDSM that are attracting me more a the moment.

I like things that are provocative and make you want to wince, yet draw your eye at the same time. Doesn’t everyone?

So to see skin laced together like this and know the tension it places the wearer’s tissues under and the procedure they have to undergo to achieve it … it’s both Ow! And Wow!

I’m definitely getting kinkier with age.

Girlfriend’s Porn

Red PVC FetishThings are getting increasingly surreal around here at the moment. The more I think about it the more I realise how far from most people’s reality we actually are.

Strangely bringing home the copy of the lads mag was greeted by “Is it any good then?” from Suze, rather than the “You filthy bastard, aren’t I good enough for you!” that many women might be expected to exclaim. Then was my first project this evening – write a quick application to automatically resize some images we received to make them more easily manageable.

As you can imagine the images are not landscapes, but acres of bare flesh.

Like I said, surreal.

And it’s amazing the way we’ve slipped into this way of living. We’ve made conscious decision about the sort of stuff we get up to in the adult world, yes, but we didn’t set out to be surrounded by sex toys, containers full of lube and adult DVDs.

Life, as they say, is something that happens while you’re trying to do other stuff. Though quite frankly it’s not working out too badly at the moment.

Porn Virgins

PornographyMy first experience of porn was a tattered shred of an old Fiesta, or Knave magazine found in the fields behind my primary school. I assume it had been stashed there by the older kids as a full magazine and never retrieved for one reason or another. The faded colour picture of a hairy muffed naked woman was the most erotic thing I’d seen up until that point.

My second experience of porn was finding my father’s porn collection in our loft when I went up there to build our immense model railway. Far higher quality, Penthouse and Mayfair don’t you know. Oh, and a copy of Razzle in the bottom of the box, LOL.

Leafing through those mags taught me more about the female anatomy than any school sex-ed lesson. It also introduced me to the tingling sensation that would eventually lead to regular erections and then to masturbation.

Because of the era in which those magazines were photographed a few stylistic points stuck which I’ve realised formed a significant part of what I find sexually arousing when I see a woman in a sexual context. The early/mid eighties date of the publications means I have a thing for curly hair, late summer afternoon sunlight, the occasional leg warmer and ankle/waist jewellery. Yes, high heels, stockings and suspenders too but all men love them, don’t they?

Yes there are certain little details that are guaranteed to get me going and they are, on the whole, a direct consequence of the images that accompanied my first excited fumblings.

Bring that forward to today, apply it to a kid of the same age taking their first steps into sexual arousal and I get a bit worried. No longer is it necessary to dig around in the back of wardrobes for visual stimulation or buy a tattered copy of a magazine, complete with dubious stains, from an older schoolmate. The Internet provides anything and everything.

Of course much of it is quite unrealistic. That’s fine if you have the life experience to know that most girls don’t do anal on a first date with two guys they’ve only just met and don’t have huge boobs and no body fat. But if you’ve never seen a girl naked, let alone explored her body, you could be forgiven for thinking that the insertion of a huge butt plug in her ass was the perfect start to foreplay.

It makes it all the more important that we ensure we teach our kids about sex in the context of relationships and wider social interaction. They need to understand that sex has to involve restraint, empathy and understanding. Not talking about sex to kids or telling them that they shouldn’t have sex until they are married in a society where marriage has become the exception rather than the rule is naïve at best, cynical at worst and will only lead to more dysfunctional realationships.

Love Glove, Glove Loving

Sexy GlovesEvery industry is suffering at the moment and if your industry has been in decline for a while the recession is a source of even more pain. One such industry is glove making. I’m not talking about mass-produced gloves here, but the very specialist, fitted and finely crafted gloves that have always been the province of the well-heeled.

Gloves are an item of clothing that transcends the utilitarian and into the decorative and sensual. Hence their erotic overtones and for some the passion that they inspire in the form of a philia or fetish.

I think that’s justification enough for the government to give out grants to all glove fetishists, who by their purchasing of gloves and glove related, erm services, would help keep thousands of skilled artisans in work. Don’t you?

PVC Perving

PVCFrankly I don’t care what they are doing, I’m happy to sit here and watch for a while.

My self control isn’t that great though.

Lucky that I’m good at picking locks …

Kinky Ladies

CageIt’s image like this that make me happy. Not the cage bit, not for us, but if that’s what make syou happy, fine. No it’s the gorgeous brunette in her very shiny, very naughty dress that floats my boat.

I wonder who got to shine her up before this shoot?

Bound And Gagged

Bondage MaidHmm. I got a phone call this afternoon when I was at work from a porn producer. Now under normal circumstances that would have been a problem as my day-job doesn’t know what I get up to outside of work. However today I was on my own in the office. Everyone taking advantage of what’s called the “super Bank Holiday” over here in the UK. Two 4 day weekends back to back. Everyone that is except me.

What this producer told me was really hot, really exciting, very naught.

But there’s a problem. I can’t tell you what it is. They want us involved but I can’t say how, where or when.

But I promise that as soon as I’m allowed to say something we’ll let you all know 🙂

Spanked Red Ass

Spanked Arse TattooI just read a quick story on The Sun’s site regarding absurd tattoos and what were the people thinking when they had them done. To be quite honest, looking at the images they have as examples you have to ask “were they sober at the time?” Because if you were in your right mind you just wouldn’t.

Aviva Yael had put together a collection of the strangest tattoos in a book called “No Regrets: The Best, Worst & Most #$%*ing Ridiculous Tattoos Ever. The book has according the paper become a global sensation.

But I think the most amusing aspect of this feature is that they used the image above and only commented about the tattooed hand on the right cheek.

When I actually was drawn to the string of love beads emblazoned on her lower back. Lol Did they notice these and were unable to mention them? What do you think?

Gigabytes Of Porn

SuzeI think there ought to be a new standard for measuring the size of hard disk drives.


Well we bought a couple of huge disks last year to ensure we had enough space to back up all the files we have for all the sites. On the box it says “holds up to xxxx thousand audio tracks”. Fat lot of use that is to me. I hardly hold any music on my disk, it’s mainly html, php and JavaScript, data backups and lots of naughty pictures.

So I suggest that we need a new measure as Megabyte, Gigabyte and Terabyte the Pornabyte. Just how could it be related to the contents of the disk. Would one Pornabyte equal, one high res image? Or maybe one minute of hardcore video.

Any suggestions.

BTW this did occur to me on the way home with the two one terabyte drives in the boot, it just resurfaced now as I noticed Suze looking at some images of some very naughty girls.

Girls And Guys Who Masturbate

BJWhat is it some people have against masturbation? The myths that have grown up around it based on no evidence whatsoever have made people feel guilty about having a bit of fun for years, probably centuries.

Unless taken to extremes masturbation can be just one aspect of a healthy and fulfilling sex life. And I’m talking to men and women here.

For those of us who do enjoy masturbation within a relationship it’s easy to find a balance between the occasional bout of manual stimulation and the rest of our sexual gratification. When you are in a relationship of course masturbation doesn’t have to be a solo affair. In fact it’s more fun with your partner and even more so if they are the one who is doing it to you.

I’m not going to go into why there are some very weird and archaic attitudes towards self gratification, maybe later perhaps in another post, what I will say is this; Masturbation is fun and even if you just do it solo, with your own hand the occasional bit of self pleasure is not something to be guilty about.

Furthermore, there are so many aids available to make masturbation more pleasurable that investigating it can be a real voyage of discovery for you and anyone else who might want to join in with you. Women have their sex toys and now men have an increasing number of products which expand the masturbatory possibilities beyond the simple orgasm.

Masturbation creams like Stroke 29 allow you to masturbate as long as you like with less risk of injuring your precious palm pall – alright your cock. Until I’d tried them out I would not have believed how much fun they can be.

if you want to feel something other than your hand around your penis you can buy masturbators from the cheap and simple like the Monkey Spanker to the more expensive models like the Fleshlight Ice which I reviewed on Sex Toys Buzz recently.

And if you want to take male masturbation to its ultimate conclusion you can combine male sex toys with prostate stimulation using a toy like the Naught Boy prostate vibrator.

And if you’re out and about shopping for sex toys you can read all our reviews on Sex Toys Buzz on the STB mobile site (tag as sex toy reviews on your mobile device)

Animal Sexuality

WolfI like to study human behaviour I find it extremely interesting, particularly that of the male.  He tends to be more primitive in his behaviour than the female.  What do I mean by that?  Well, most males whether they care to admit it or not do things to secure a sexual partner or in some cases simply for sexual gratification.  This behaviour of course is in relation to social interaction with the opposite sex.

Recently I have been interacting a lot on social networking sites and as you may well expect given my previous observations, the majority of my friends are male.  This is by no means a conscious decision by me in that I only accept males, I would say that the number of males who approach me as opposed to females is about 97%.

Then I ask myself why?  Most probably because I like to flirt and involve them in my adult sites.  This may be putting the females off, I don’t really know as I also promote sex toys.

And a small proportion of the guys on there want to private message for sexual gratification, which is fine once for a bit of fun but tedious when all they want to do is interact behind the scenes for there own pleasure.  Then it becomes boring and makes me wonder if I should charge.  Lol

More recently I have noticed a social etiquette within the males I associate with.  If one guy starts to reciprocate and flirt back with me the others stand aside and don’t join in.  Almost as if waiting turn.  Tell me guys is this an unspoken rule amongst you that you give the guy a chance and take a side seat if he seems to be getting somewhere?

I told you I was interested in human behaviour but it does make you analyse situations perhaps a little too much.  What do you think?

Xxx Pick, The More You Do It The More You Want It

Sex In The GrassI love outdoor sex, something to do with the element of being discovered making the whole act more dangerous and the fresh air of course.  It also helps if it is a warm sunny day or even a balmy evening.  Oooh, got myself reminiscing now.

These thoughts and feelings were just awoken in me when I visited Adult Blog Hub and read fellow Brit Hussy At Last’s postThe More You Do It The More You Want It” which I think sums up quite adequately my attitude to sex too.  😉

She writes a wonderful post about outdoor sex, an imaginative use of salad oil and the usefulness of a tea towel.  I find myself longing for the return of the hot spell we just had over here…


Filthy Angels And Daemons

Daemon GirlIt’s tradition in the western world to associate aspects of the human personality with good or evil. Whether you regard the good and evil at play here as the result of external forces or as an inherent part of the human psyche is irrelevant, what matters is that some forms of behaviour are regarded as good and some evil, or at least bad.

In most cases the majority of right-thinking individuals would agree what is good/bad, virtuous/evil. Murder, theft etc are obvious candidates for the evil tag and kindness, compassion and the like as traits that would be thought of as good and desirable.

The aspect of human behaviour that is too often associated with the darker side of the human condition is sex and sexuality. The reasons have their roots in the need for the ruling classes to find new ways to control those serving them. In some ancient societies sex and sexuality were celebrated and a source of joy and yet in each case subsequent regimes and philosophies have marked their predecessors as depraved and degenerate.

One of the most recent examples of this was the advent of national socialism in Germany in the 1930s. The previous Weimar Republic was denounced as corrupt and decadent (morally and sexually) by the Nazis who attributed it with the economic woes of the German nation after the first world  war. Yet what followed was what is generally regarded as one of the most inhuman and vile regimes ever to take power in Europe.

Looking further back and perhaps with more relevance directly to sexuality the civilisations of Egypt, Rome and Babylon have all been depicted as evil, at least in part because they embraced sex and the joy which can be derived from sex. Yes these societies all had reprehensible aspects, especially when viewed through our modern eyes, but despite many centuries criticisms made of them by civilisations that succeeded them still colour our views of sexuality.

In Egypt at one point the Pharaoh would masturbate every morning symbolically re-creating the universe as his supposed god-ancestor had done. In Rome pagan festivals celebrated fertility and procreation, Lupercalia being the most well know which has been watered down  over two millennia and adopted as Valentine’s Day.

Anal sex too has been condemned as an intrinsically evil act because of its association with the residents of a certain town next to the Dead Sea.

In every case it seems that there is no logical reason to condemn a sexual practice (so long as the partners consent and are not blood relatives) except to use that condemnation as part of a propaganda campaign against a former enemy or regime.

Sodom may have been a pretty nasty place when Lot saw it, but buggery was probably the least of its problems. More likely it was a lawless and cruel society like many in the world at that time. The anal sex just got co-opted as a shorthand for deviance and lack of morals.

Egypt was cruel and oppressive to many of those who lived there, and the ruling classes did interbreed. In fact that may have contributed to their downfall. However cracking one off is not evil in itself.

And as for you people running around the streets of Rome getting excited and spreading their wild oats … that didn’t bring down the empire, the impossibility of managing the largest civilisation in the world for 600 years did that.

If you want to think of us all as inhabited by angels and daemons then fine. However those little putti wearing halos or horns are not evil just part of a mixture of what makes us human.

Meet The Porn Star Next Door

Fur CoatWould you recognise a porn star if you met them in the street? I don’t mean one you have seen on camera, but a professional porn performer who simply passed you as you were walking to the supermarket.

I can think of several different performers, who I shall not name, all of whom fall into one of three categories. That is yes, no and undecided.

The majority of performers that I’ve actually met would blend into a crowd when not on a shoot. When not dressed in leather, PVC or other such porn uniforms they look just like everyone else. Boring maybe, but true. If you didn’t know who they were they’d walk right past you without you even giving them a second glance.

There are a couple that, because of their distinctive personalities you would have to ask the question – What do they do for a living?

But there is one performer who on every occasion I have met her has been wearing what I can only describe as her fuck-me clothes. She is incidentally one of the nicest people you’d wish to meet, but she is always in-character because I think the persona she has on-screen is her real life persona. Very honest and very British.

Most of us wear a mask when we present ourselves to other people so it’s refreshing that working in an industry that many people would sneer at and regard as sleazy she is simply herself.

And no, you’ll have to work out who it is because I’m a gentleman and I’m not letting on.

Now the next question is, would you recognise me or Suze?

Fucking Doggy Style

Doggy StyleWe visited my parents today to drop off a Birthday card and present for my father.  It’s nice to catch up on family gossip and spend some time with my parents and normally it’s a rushed affair at the weekend because we have so many other commitments including this site and our others.

As usual they were pleased to see us and offer us the mandatory cup of tea.  It was nice to be able to sit in the garden instead of the house and enjoy some of this glorious weather we are having at the moment.

My family have a juevenile boxer dog who is lovely but overly affectionate to the point that he will given the opportunity wag his tail and lick you all over from the moment you arrive until you leave.  I think he must have been dropped on his head as a pup.  Lol

He also has a favourite soft toy which is a huge stuffed dog which he carries around and occasionally touses.  I was chatting away to my mother with the dog in my peripheral vision doing what he normally does shaking his dog from side to side.

Both of us were busily engaged in conversation when I became aware of the dog’s ass moving up and down.  Continuing the conversation I turned my head to see more clearly what he was up to.  I couldn’t believe my eyes and felt a giggle well up in me which I tried to stifle as I swiftly turned back to my mother.

The dog was only trying to shag his fellow canine right there in front of us.  I glanced over to Alex who had been distracted by the dog’s amorous actions and was clearly stifling a laugh too.

My mother worked out what was going on and turned to see the dog engaged in a bit of nookie and commented “I don’t know why he’s doing that, he’s been done”.  Well that was it, both Alex and I burst out laughing.

I remember thinking to myself that I won’t be picking up his toys any more.  lol


Teen Angels, Not So Angelic

Girls as they grow up spend lots of time wishing that they were older and larger in the boob department. And some are lucky enough to have their prayers answered and it may seem to teenagers like me that they have been just plain greedy, having been a 32AA cup size in to my late 20’s.

I did almost anything to enhance, no make my boobs look bigger although I did draw the line at padding out my bra with tissue. There were no chicken fillets to help you out back then. You had to rely on the bra manufacturers taking pity on you and providing oodles of padding.

Padding is good it makes you look much larger than your natural size and if you have added underwiring or scaffolding as some know it, all the better. And padding helps in cold weather too, it helps to keep you warm and stops your nipples from poking through your bra and looking like chapel hat pegs. Lol

As I read the other day underwiring can also save your life. A woman from Detroit had luck on her side when a burglars bullet bounced off her underwiring. She was looking at the house nextdoor which was being burgled when a bullet smashed though the window.

It was deflected off the underwiring and she avoided serious injury. So there you have it, good underwear can really save your life.

Which reminds me of Victorias Secrets…