I’ve just finished one of my more random Internet excursions that took me way back to my childhood. The details of my Web journey are irrelevant though it confirmed to me that I’ve never been one for girls as such. I don’t mean that when I was a boy I didn’t go out with girls, simply that I don’t like girly girls.
Feminine yes, that’s something entirely different and is often confused with being girly. Feminine is about being sophisticated, self-assured, controlled and yet knowing when to let go and unleash the passionate female within. It is not talking about frilly things all the time and pretending to be less intelligent than you are.
Maybe it’s a way of putting men who are intimidated by strong women at their ease but I hate girls who loose all their opinions, intelligence and personality when they’re around a guy they find attractive, or at least a guy who they think finds them attractive. In a way you could say that if they are daft enough to become living Barbie dolls for a bloke then they deserve exactly what they get. Then again if young men think that women are just giggling idiots waiting to become ornaments for their arms they are hardly going to look any further than something that appears to be a compliant and willing partner.
OK so that’s a generalisation and things have moved on a bit since I was at primary school but my original point is still valid. I have always found mature, intelligent women attractive and I’m turned off by bimbo-ism. Relationships are partnerships and I can’t think of many things more hideous than an un-balanced and contrived pairing that is formed from either desperation or compliance with society’s expectations of what you should be.
The other extreme is of course the overly assertive female. Like men women can become too assertive, too sure of themselves sometimes in an attempt to compensate for what they perceive as their own shortcomings. It doesn’t matter what sex you are male or female, I am always suspicious of anyone who tells you categorically “how it is”. It’s like those awful self-help books where you chant mantras to increase your self-esteem. The supreme irony of course is that in the last week or so I heard of some research that seems to prove the chanting of such mantras actually subconsciously undermines your self-esteem. LOL
Peer pressure is something I noticed very early on at school. The groups of girls and boys who seemed to pick up on an idea, a friendship, a TV programme or a film and talk about nothing else. Then they’d postulate theorise and develop opinions about whatever it was that grew so disproportionate to original (film, programme or whatever) that it became surreally displaced from reality.
One instance I remember was a group of friends (me included in this) who started to show off about how they had been up soooo late the night before and seen a Godzilla (or similar) monster flick. We all joined in and added our own embellishments and observations to prove that we’d seen it. Me included, LOL. I wager that none of us had stayed up past the first ten minutes at which point we’d be ushered off to bed – hell we were about eight! I know we were all lying because we were all agreeing and confirming what the guy just before us had said. Quite a vivid memory that one, I can even tell you exactly where in the school yard we were standing.
So please, give me a real, honest woman to talk to, to flirt with and to fuck!