Going Wild In The Country

By | September 22, 2008

The Earth Moved For Me How About You?

Alex won a small amount on the national lottery here, don’t get excited it’s not enough to change our lives but every little helps.

To celebrate we went out for lunch at our favourite country pub. It really is a little gem, no brewery makeover or theme pub atmosphere there. Not even music, just good ales, food and talk. Oh, and lets not forget the characters who go in there, everyone from dalesmen and women to ramblers but we don’t like to talk about them. Lol

They once had a group from the Caravan Club in there, it was hilarious. Main topics of conversation facilities at the pitch and the toilets. I kid you not, they were actually comparing site toilets they had visited in a sort of one-upmanship fashion. Alex and I had a problem keeping our faces straight.

Today’s speciality was fraternising at the bar. A couple in their mid thirties and what looked to be someone’s mother were stood at the bar in view from where we sat eagerly awaiting our food. Although they were clearly together as they made their selections from the extensive menu on the bar, no contact was made between the girl and the guy. They could have been brother and sister and for all intents and purposes that is what they appeared to be.

Alex and I continued to observe the bar area, I’m not quite sure why but something kept my focus on the trio. Then mother disappeared bar right, we assumed to head off in the direction of the toilets.

She had been gone a matter of 30 seconds and the couple faced each other and she threw her hands around his neck and started to kiss him. You should have seen the others at the bar trying not to pay heed as they smooched in a very overt fashion.

Then they split and he returned to staring over the bar waiting for service and she stood apart from him, no holding hands or touching in any way. I was intrigued by now and gripped trying to work out what exactly was going on.

You know how you start to invent circumstances and peoples history, well that is exactly what I started to do. I know I’m sad aren’t I! šŸ™‚ The next thing that happens is mother this time leaves the pub through the front door and once again they return to their kissing but this time no arms around the neck job.

Mother returns and they collect up their drinks and disappear out of the door to the front of the pub. I will point out that there are tables at the front to sit at and today was very clement. I surmised that there was some kind of affair going on that they didn’t want someone’s mother to know about. Strange very strangeā€¦and I left it at that. Alex thought I had gone mad. Lol

Then it happenedā€¦vibrations coming from the long backseat we were both sitting on and a couple at the adjacent table. The whole of the back wall of the pub has one long settle on it and tables drawn up along it with chairs. I tried not to draw attention to the strong vibrations, to be honest I wondered if Alex had brought out one of our toys, possibly with a remote in his pocket.

So I remained quiet. At least I did the first time. The second time it happened I just couldn’t contain myself and started to giggle as I looked to Alex for an explanation. He just returned the blank look and the laughter. It happened again and we just couldn’t find the source it even made the guy sitting next to Alex laugh.

Could it have been the pipes in the cellar full of air or was the guy next to Alex slightly flatulent? I suppose we will never find out but it was a very interesting lunch.