Down and Not Going Out

By | May 3, 2007

I knew I wanted to write something tonight, but I wasn’t sure what to write about. You’d have thought that wasn’t a big ask, but I’m a little out of sorts. Suze has gone out with the girls from work, one of them has a birthday, so I’m in on my own. It’s the first girly night out she’s had in ages and, it has just occurred to me, the first night we’ve been apart in a long time. Boring maybe, but you get used to someone being around especially when we’re as close as we are. She should be back in a couple of hours, but even knowing that the place seems rather empty without her around.

So to keep me occupied I thought … as we always write about adult subjects, and for the most part sex, it occurred to me that I should write about aversions to sex.

We’re pretty open in real life about sex, in the right company of course, but not as open as online 🙂 So writing about the opposite, an actual aversion to/fear of sex, is virgin territory and therefore should be rich in new ideas and trains of thought.

If you Google a few terms you come to the key word coitophobia. Apologies to everyone who hates compound Latin/Greek words, but I didn’t create this term. As I searched through the first few results on Google against the word I came to the conclusion that whoever did simply created another word with little meaning outside the realms of self-help products and catch-all online medical diagnosis sites.

Quite honestly I got disheartened and gave up. The thought of trawling through site after site with virtually the same bland and ultimately pointless descriptions of the condition in the hope of finding a valid and well researched paper got me down. I must be winding down to the weekend early as I’m not usually that easily put off. I found no insight or explanation of any aspects of the condition other than generic phrases that could have described any other phobia. Perhaps I’m expecting too much or I’m in the wrong frame of mind.

Anyway, I suppose the point of this, if there is one, is that the Internet is a wonderful thing, but it’s all too easy to create content by copying it from someone else just to get people to visit your ad-laden site of little or no intrinsic merit. I think I’m on a downer here LOL.

While I’m getting pissed off at sites for not being intelligent and creative I ought to say that I think what really got me was that the people likely to search for terms such as this are looking for help. They are not looking to buy self-help books. Or maybe they are? I suppose the thought of buying the answer to any problem that you have and regard as delicate over the Internet does have a certain comfortable feel to it. The anonymity, the relief at not having to discuss it with your partner, a friend or your family doctor.

It’s a pity then that the sites I read were either just after the Google rank/your clicks for their advertisements, or wanted to sell you a product. Am I naïve? Or does everyone have days when they look at the Internet and think “This could be so much more”?

There are many, many adult bloggers out there producing great content, which is then scraped by idiots onto their own collection of blogs just to get traffic for adverts and scams. And that ticks me off too, bloody lazy, mindless and unimaginative. I’m not talking about online magazine/news sites, but automated RSS consumers that republish without an author’s permission or knowledge. Site’s whose owners have enought technical knowledge to steal, but not enough intelligence to create anything original.

And I was in such a good mood when I got home from work 😀