I came across this article from four years ago about the changes which take place when a couple settle down into a stable relationship. It would appear that the physiological changes mirror what everyone who has had a long term relationship already knows. The initial flush of excitement and passion becomes deeper and more subtle – the wildness of those first few months fades but is replaced by something stronger, more intense and if you are lucky more enduring.
My own conclusion from this is that when it comes to people with a predisposition to infidelity they must either be addicted to the chemical signature of early relationships or are just complete bastards. OK, OK, I know some relationships don’t work out but there are serial philanderers out there who either seek out partners for a quick thrill and nothing else or can’t find it in themselves to form a long term bond.
Some of this may be chemical/hormonal in origin, so I do have a bit of sympathy for them (though more for their cuckolded partners), but even if this is the case surely they must see the wreckage they leave behind when their partner – who may be unaware of their compulsion to stray – is suddenly dumped. Relationships are complex things and if you body is playing tricks on you that might go part of the way to explaining the complexity. You can never fully rationalise love and passion, thank goodness, I mean where would be the fun in that.
But if your body is genuinely incapable of making the transition from the first flush of passion to a deeply fulfilling long term relationship then not being able to control that must be a real burden.