The Beginner’s Strap-on from Pipedream is just the sort of toy that works for those couples wanting to try a bit of strap-on action and those guys who might be a bit unsure about the idea.

Whether it’s about power exchange or the woman wanting to do a bit of thrusting this is a toy that ticks all the boxes for beginners in anal play. And I mean any sort of anal play. The harness is made from webbing with plastic adjusters, the pad behind the dildo/probe section is velvet and the retaining ring for the dildo is soft plastic.

The dildo itself is a soft, blue jelly plastic (don’t worry, it’s pthalate free) with a gently rounded tip and slender tapering length. It’s 12 centimetres long and at its widest 3 centimetres in diameter.

Seeing Suze with a cock, albeit an artificial one, is to say the least a bit odd. I’m not just talking about from my perspective. It made her a bit giggly and she couldn’t help but twang her new appendage as it stuck out in front of her. I laid out a towel and had the lube ready.

We tried three positions. First traditional doggy, that was good but getting the height right meant that the dildo kept falling out. Or more accurately springing out. At only 12 centimetres good hip control is needed to keep it inserted in your partner.

Next we tried with me on my side. Again the length of the dildo prevented Suze from making more than a few thrusts before it popped out of my ass.

Finally we tried with me on my back with my knees tucked up. This worked best and despite the slight awkwardness caused by Suze’s inexperience as the possessor of a cock worked best, both because the dildo stayed in as she thrust, but also because she could see the expression on my face.

The dildo’s smooth shape and relatively small size is great because it stimulates rather than overwhelms you. It’s soft, but just rigid enough to allow penetration.

I didn’t get hard and cum buckets while she fucked me but Suze derived a great deal of satisfaction from learning how to thrust and watching me react to her efforts. We haven’t finished with this toy and will be trying it again to get Suze’s technique just right. Practice makes perfect.

The following night we adjusted the harness and found that by moving it up towards Suze’s tummy by only a few centimetres we were able to give her more control and allow her to fuck me doggy style. The slim, slowly tapering shape of the dildo allowed her to slowly increase the depth of her thrusts until she was able to grind her pelvis against my buttocks.

Suze found the harness comfortable to wear. The main issue was not the strap-on, but the fact that she, like all women, is not a natural when it comes to swinging her pelvis and fucking someone. That is something that can be addressed with practice and careful adjustment of the harness. Like all such toys learning how to use it is part of the fun.

So if you want to experiment beyond a lubed finger up the ass, or a butt plug the Beginner’s Strap-on from Pipedream could be the one for you.

You can see our video of the Lelo Lilly here.

The Lily has a wonderful feel to it, making it very tactile being made from PC-ABS. The Lily is a chargeable toy and takes up to 2 hours to charge and then provides up to 7 hours of pleasure. What a small price to pay!

It can be left on standby for up to 90 days, so you can go back to it time and time again and believe me you will.

Some facts for those of you who like to know:

The Lily is 75 x 36 x 25mm in size
It weighs in at just 40g
Its frequency is 80Hz, I didn’t know what this meant either but apparently it means that it vibrates at a rate of 80 cycles per second. Wow!
It is very quiet, being less than 80 dB
Best of all it has variable speed settings

Because my lunch breaks can be pretty glum these days with the dull dark days I thought I would secrete this little delight in to my glove box for lunchtime. I usually drive off down the road to the local café to pick up a sandwich at lunch and sit and eat it in my car.

The problem with this is it only takes me about 20 minutes to drive to the café and eat, so what should I do with the other 40 minutes? Have a bit of girlie fun that’s what. I’m not one for wasting valuable time and I wanted to try this little vibe out on my own. I wanted to indulge myself. After all Alex can read this and find out exactly what I got up to on Friday lunchtime.

I went to the café, ordered a ham and pickle breadcake and retuned to the car. I turned on radio one and listened to the latest music whilst eating my dinner. All the while my mind was on dessert. Lol

My car was parked in its usual spot just behind a housing estate in the parking bays, with no direct onlookers. It has turned quite cold over here and I had my black lamb’s wool sweater and black trousers on, warm and cuddly.

I retrieved my Lily from the glovebox and it was a little cold as the ambient temperature was about the same as a penguin’s beak. It could not possibly go anywhere near to my bits and pieces like that. I decided to push in inside the right cup of my bra, it was warm in there. It was like inserting a cold chicken fillet inside, it nestled perfectly against my warm breast.

Radio One blasted out the latest track from The Reverend and The Makers and I waited whilst doing a bit of an upper body dance in the car. Nobody watching so no need to feel inhibited. Lol

When the track had finished I removed the Lily from my bra cup and undid the button on my trouser waistband, enabling access in to my panties. With a few clicks of the button I had fired the Lily in to life, it was vibrating so fast that I was finding it hard to hold. Lol I placed the Lily with the vibrating tip teasing my clitoris. The natural curve of the Lily enabled it to sit close to my pussy.

I pushed back in to my seat and raised my hips, pushing the Lily more firmly against my clitoris. It had now worked its way between my labia and I was quite literally buzzing. The extra pressure afforded by my trousers against the Lily was adding to the pleasure. I could feel my clit swelling with every vibration.

My eyes were now closed and I didn’t care who walked past my car. The windows were steamed but I was alone and you could see my hands. Lol The Lily can be inserted inside your pants and provide you with the most arousing of sensations.

With very little clearance between me and the steering wheel I started to buck and grip my buttocks together. My feet were flat to the floor of the car and my ass was now lifting from the seat with buttock clenched. Fuck…

The combination of being outside in my car and feeling that vibe working on my clit sent me to seventh heaven as I came with back arched and ass off seat. I twitched as my orgasm washed over me and then collapsed in to my seat.

When I finally came round I couldn’t see a thing through the windows they were so heavily steamed but I had enough time to demist before heading back to work. I placed my wet and heavily scented Lily back inside the glove box, wrapped in toilet tissue. My panties would just have to dry out on me during the afternoon.

“Did you have a nice lunch?”, I was asked on my return…

…what do you think?

The Lelo Lily is a beautiful device, to look at, handle and to use. Lelo refer to their products as object d’art and they truly are. And unlike other beautiful things they do more than sit on your coffee table. The Lily would make a wonderfully indulgent present this Christmas for you or your partner.

Tags: Lelo, Lelo Lily, Lelo review, Lelo Lily review, Lily Pleasure Object, Lelo Lily Pleasure Object, rechargeable vibrator, Lelo Lily rechargeable vibrator, adult toy review, sex toy review, mini vibrator, rechargeable mini vibrator

Jenna Jameson's Perfect Pair

Oh, before I begin, if you want to see Suze playing with Jenna Jameson’s boobs see this video.

It’s not often that you get to tit fuck a porn star, but that’s what Jenna’s Perfect pair from Doc Johnson gives you the opportunity to do. We were sent this exact replica of Jenna’s famous breasts for me to test. And as an experienced sex toy tester I rose to the challenge. Yes, pun very much intended.

Now, obviously you’d have thought that using a toy like this, which is in essence a male masturbator, would be a solo affair. Well not in this house. While I might have slight exhibitionist tendencies, Suze is most definitely developing into a huge voyeur. Not for the first time she watched me from the very start of my test, slowly stroking myself to erection, until my climax.

Before I describe the use of the toy I ought to let you know a few things about Jenna’s Perfect Pair. As mentioned above they are formed from Doc Johnson’s UR3 material. It has a firmness, combined with pliability that allows the Doc Johnson people to make incredibly realistic toys that feel like human skin. As you can see from the video the breasts are of the ultra-pert silicone enhanced variety, being moulded from Jenna Jameson. This means there’s an inviting valley between them begging for your cock to be inserted.

Because they are modelled on the real thing the breasts are slightly asymmetrical and therefore much more acceptable as ersatz boobs. The nipples are a delicate pink and the skin the standard UR3 fleshy tone.

When you use Jenna’s boobs you have to ensure two things. First that they are lightly lubed with a water based lube and second that you have a nice hard stiffy. Without the lubrication your skin will drag and without a firm erection you may find it difficult to both enclose your cock between the boobs and penetrate the tight cavern that this creates.

With plenty of lube to hand and a towel underneath them to capture the ensuing spillages I was ready to rock; And get my rocks off.

Suitably aroused and with Jenna Jameson’s boobs lubed I knelt astride them while Suze watched. I lay my cock between her tits and felt the coolness of the UR3. I rather liked that sensation. While you can warm the toy in warm water to raise its temperature you’re advised not to put it in the oven or microwave – that could be an interesting one to explain to the fire service – but I digress. This was when I found that you need to be very firmly erect to use the toy as to fully enclose your cock you need to squeeze them together and this makes the opening between them very small.

I began to thrust in and out, my cock appearing and disappearing between them, mesmerising Suze who loves to watch me masturbate. I’m sure that on your own you could add a little porn to the experience, maybe some of Jenna herself, I mean, imagine watching a scene with Jenna Jameson being tit-fucked while you fucked her tits, that would be POV to the max. For now I had my own porn performer, Suze slowly rubbing her clit for my entertainment and her pleasure.

I found that using the Perfect Pair I had to ensure just the right level of lubrication, occasionally adding just a drop of lube to easy the passage of my now raging hard-on between the pink mounds.

Suze was rolling about on the bed now, her hand between her legs. She moaned and only now did her eyes close, the orgasm interrupting the close-up view she had of my thrusting cock.

Suze’s eyes were sparkling as I began to feel the orgasm rising in my groin, looking at her while I was pumping into Jenna Jameson’s chest was surreal and arousing at the same time. I knew she wanted to see me come and wasn’t about to disappoint her. One final thrust and I buirried myself deep in between Jenna’s mounds, pulling the skin of my cock back and making the head of my penis shine.

Muscular contractions pumped semen towards a waiting Suze, once, twice, three times. I released the breasts and lifted my cock from between the twin mounds. I grasped my still rock hard member milking every drop from it, a trail of semen dribbling across Jenna’s left nipple. A blob of cum hit Suze on the tip of her nose as my muscular pumping subsided. Suze leant forward and licked Jenna’s nipple clean…

Jenna’s Perfect Pair are possibly the ultimate in male breast masturbators, They are made from top quality materials, and can take a serious pounding. I can vouch for that. The toy is heavy so it isn’t going to move around when you use it. They are a simple toy, in that you don’t have any vibrating function, but that’s the key to them. Since when did you meet a woman with a vibrating chest? If you love masturbation and would love to cum on a porn star’s chest then who better than Jenna Jameson?

Tags: Jenna Jameson, Jennas Perfect Pair, sex toy review, adult toy review, masturbator, masturbation, male sex toy, tit wank

So we like to try toys that are somewhere in between. The Allure XXX Leather Whip certainly falls into that category.

The toy is made from very soft leather. Real leather too so you get the aroma of freshly tanned hide as soon as you open the packaging. The tails of the whip are only 30cm long, so the toy is compact and easy to store, or if you use the handy wrist strap, easy to hang on the bedpost as we do.

Yes this is one of those toys that since its arrival is kept close at hand in the AlexSuze boudoir. It’s the sign of a good toy that out of the vast array we’ve reviewed the whip has already joined the select band of bedroom essentials we have.

To understand why you have to know what the whip feels like in action.

Allure Leather Whip Video

I kept this up for a while and then, when I thought she was at her ease I flicked my wrist and brought it down on her flesh with a cruel thwack. She moaned an appreciative moan.

That rather took me by surprise. Suze isn’t one to enjoy pain and that’s what I thought the swift flick of my wrist would have caused. Not the intense pain that would have signalled a bruise to come, but I did intend to send a stinging sensation across her skin.

I tried again, a little harder, then harder still. Despite the fact that I thwacked Suze as hard as I could she confirmed that the effect was still well on the pleasurable side of painful. She positively loved it when I stroked her cheek with the dangling ends of the whip too as she loves the smell of leather and drank in the aroma.

Roles reversed I experienced a similar set of sensations.

The light, almost tickling caress of the tips of the whip. Then the tingling, slightly stinging kiss of the whip as your partner brings it down hard across your skin, followed by a warm glow.

If you use the whip in a wrist-flicking figure of eight motion to flay one buttock, then the other, I’m sure you could (eventually) make your sub’s bum tender and sensitive, but it would take ages.

That’s the key to this toy. It’s virtually impossible to inflict serious pain with it. That’s not the point. It spans the gap between the cheap, effectively novelty items and full-on BDSM toys. It allows you to play and take stimulation to the edge of pain but no further.

It’s like being led to the door of a fully equipped dungeon but not being pushed through.

Tags: leather whip, leather whip review, allure triple x, allure XXX, sex toy review, leather toys, BDSM, BDSM sex toy