{"id":110,"date":"2006-12-26T12:08:00","date_gmt":"2006-12-26T11:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.alexsuze.com\/blog\/?p=110"},"modified":"2006-12-26T12:13:48","modified_gmt":"2006-12-26T11:13:48","slug":"it%e2%80%99s-a-cracker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=110","title":{"rendered":"It’s A Cracker!"},"content":{"rendered":"

We both hope all our readers had a wonderful Christmas and indulged heavily in whatever they enjoy!<\/p>\n

Alex and I have had a fairly quiet Christmas this year.\u00a0 We spent Christmas Eve in bed when we finally finish the last minute preparations.\u00a0 Including getting the house nice and tidy for Alex’s parents to come over to eat on Christmas Day.\u00a0 I don’t keep an untidy or dirty house but somehow it makes you so conscious when you know that your potential in-laws are coming over.\u00a0<\/p>\n

So Sunday was tidy, tidy, tidy, especially the sex toys which we tend to leave around the place without even a thought.\u00a0 We are so comfortable about our sexuality and each other that we don’t tend to look upon having toys to hand or where we last used them as being strange.\u00a0 The odd R18 DVD can be left out by the player without even a thought.\u00a0 You have to develop an unfamiliar view point when expecting company, in order that you seek and hide anything which could incriminate you as being sexually active.\u00a0 Lol<\/p>\n

Butt plugs, cock rings and vibrators are common place around the bedroom and the Cupids Couch was quite happy remaining inflated in one of the spare rooms.\u00a0 But we couldn’t take the chance that Alex’s parents wouldn’t happen on it by accident so we had to deflate it and put it under our bed.\u00a0 \ud83d\ude00\u00a0 Also the rabbit which Alex fucked me with the previous night as I sat typing in this very chair at my desk.\u00a0 Had to be removed from the bookshelf and hidden away.<\/p>\n

Well, after all the tidying and cleaning preparations for the Christmas meal we were both exhausted.\u00a0 So at around 10pm we both decided to make our way to the bedroom and watch some TV to relax for a while.\u00a0 We both lay side by side playing with each other, comfortable but also enjoying the release from the intensity of the day’s activities.\u00a0 It didn’t take long for Alex to get hard, he flipped me over and I assumed the position on all fours facing the bedhead.\u00a0 He may have been tired but he fucked me with such vigour that at one stage he pushed me in to the wall behind the bed and I banged my head!\u00a0 \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

He became quite wild and was making animalistic sounds behind me.\u00a0 I just had to look over my shoulder and he had his head pointing upwards, eyes rolling and practically snarling like a wolf.\u00a0 I must admit I love to see him taken over by this inner beast, it makes him rough and insatiable.\u00a0 Even after he has come inside me he continues to thrust and drain every last drop of semen from his body.\u00a0 Usually he is very sensitive after he has ejaculated but when he unleashes the beast he is insatiable.\u00a0 And lets face it who am I to complain?<\/p>\n

After the animal fuck we both cleaned up and then drifted off in to a well deserved sleep.<\/p>\n

The meal was going well, the turkey was cooked and resting on the kitchen side.\u00a0 The parsnips and potatoes were cooking in the oven.\u00a0 But when I checked them a while later they were no browner than last time I checked.\u00a0 It was then I noticed that the cooker didn’t seem very warm either.\u00a0 Yes, you guessed it!\u00a0 The bloody cooker had only gone and packed up.<\/p>\n

Fortunately we have a small convection\/micro wave oven so I placed them on the appropriate trays and finished them off in there.\u00a0 All things taken in to consideration the meal turned out OK.\u00a0 I’m sure many people would have panicked at this point, normally I would but by the time the disaster hit I was a little merry on the red I had been sipping whilst cooking.\u00a0 My attitude went from “Oh, no!” to “Fuck it” within seconds.\u00a0 So anyone planning on cooking their first Christmas dinner next year, take my advice and take a liquid companion in to the kitchen with you before you start.\u00a0 LOL<\/p>\n

The crackers we bought this year were a revelation.\u00a0 Mine contained this\u2026has anyone any idea what it is?<\/p>\n

Just to give you some techie info, the span between the two balls is roughly 4cm and both of them screw off.\u00a0 Without thinking Alex proffered that it could be a Prince Albert.\u00a0 His dad laughed, I looked a little taken aback and his mum sat looking puzzled for a moment before joining in the laughter.\u00a0 \ud83d\ude00\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

There are two crackers left in the box and in one of them is this little beauty.<\/p>\n

Yes, you were thinking the same as me weren’t you?\u00a0 It could be a mini butt plug but I think it is probably more likely to be a bottle stopper.\u00a0 \ud83d\ude42\u00a0 I wonder if Adult stores do their own versions of naughty crackers\u2026that would be fun for next year!<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

I’m doing quite well over at 25 Peeps at the moment, go and show me some love by clicking my eyes.<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We both hope all our readers had a wonderful Christmas and indulged heavily in whatever they enjoy! Alex and I have had a fairly quiet Christmas this year.\u00a0 We spent … Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/110"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=110"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/110\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=110"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=110"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=110"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}