{"id":11674,"date":"2011-01-21T08:56:26","date_gmt":"2011-01-21T08:56:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=11674"},"modified":"2011-01-20T20:32:15","modified_gmt":"2011-01-20T20:32:15","slug":"hello-boys-shall-i-give-you-wood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=11674","title":{"rendered":"Hello Boys, Shall I Give You Wood?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignleft\" style=\"margin: 5px;\" title=\"American Pie\" src=\"\/images\/american-pie.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"294\" height=\"310\" \/>I\u2019ve written before about methods of masturbation and the story about a friend coming back to the house he shared as a student to a surprise. His housemate had fallen asleep on the sofa with his trousers around his ankles and clutching his cock with a tea towel.<\/p>\n<p>The same guy also told me of his time working in a pork pie factory to earn a crust (sorry couldn\u2019t refuse that) and what the guys there got up to. They would use huge quantities of lard to make the crust for the pies. This lard was delivered in large blocks.<\/p>\n<p>I bet you can\u2019t imagine how they abused it. I know it had the same reaction from me, I didn\u2019t want to eat a pork pie for months after that revelation. Lol<\/p>\n<p>It never fails to amaze me how men will improvise rather than purchase a toy which will satisfy them without the risk. The latest story I read was about a guy shagging a tree in a park.<\/p>\n<p>Now I may not be male but how the hell do you do that?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019ve written before about methods of masturbation and the story about a friend coming back to the house he shared as a student to a surprise. His housemate had fallen &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=11674\" class=\"more-link\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1120,77,3,35,25],"tags":[4254],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11674"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11674"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11674\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11675,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11674\/revisions\/11675"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11674"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11674"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11674"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}