{"id":2993,"date":"2009-06-08T17:45:42","date_gmt":"2009-06-08T16:45:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=2993"},"modified":"2009-06-08T17:46:14","modified_gmt":"2009-06-08T16:46:14","slug":"porn-getting-drunk-and-brown-envelopes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=2993","title":{"rendered":"Porn, Getting Drunk And Brown Envelopes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignleft\" style=\"float: left; border: 0; margin: 5px;\" src=\"\/images\/pornmags.jpg\" alt=\"Porn Mags\" width=\"250\" height=\"215\" \/>Getting dirty magazines was always an adventure when I was a kid. Before I was old enough it was a nerve-wracking ordeal to find a shop with a shopkeeper who didn&#8217;t give a monkey&#8217;s how old you were so long as you had enough cash to cover the cost of the publication.<\/p>\n<p>Having said that it was always pretty nerve-wracking experience, even when I was old enough. The strange looks from the man behind the counter, the really disgusted looks if it was a woman \u2026 happy days LOL<\/p>\n<p>The only time I didn&#8217;t feel guilty about buying a jazz mag was when I was blind drunk on tequila in Soho and bought a couple of mags to take back on the train to Purley (long story involving a car, a mate who worked for an insurance company and a long night of drinking). The rather grizzly guy who served us must have been pissing himself at our wobbly demeanour and glazed stares. Probably short-changed us too, and who could blame him. It was Soho after all and that&#8217;s all part of the experience. Well it was back then anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Well now it&#8217;s easier, if online porn isn&#8217;t good enough for you it&#8217;s possible to have it delivered to your door. And that&#8217;s exactly what one of the UK&#8217;s adult publishers did last week. The plain grey envelope dropped onto the mat this morning and was waiting for me when I got home. Free porn, you can&#8217;t beat it.<\/p>\n<p>However due to the UK&#8217;s strict porn laws it is rather edited. Unlike the stuff you can buy from a licensed sex shop, or see online, or on your phone you can&#8217;t see penetration, mouth to genital contact, toy insertion \u2026 sensible I suppose as under-age consumers could order it online or obtain it via a less than vigilant newsagent with a little subterfuge.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, tonight&#8217;s research is reading porn mags. Great. Do you actually read porn mags?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Getting dirty magazines was always an adventure when I was a kid. Before I was old enough it was a nerve-wracking ordeal to find a shop with a shopkeeper who &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=2993\" class=\"more-link\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2993"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2993"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2993\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2993"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2993"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2993"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}