{"id":376,"date":"2007-07-12T20:32:27","date_gmt":"2007-07-12T20:32:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.alexsuze.com\/blog\/?p=376"},"modified":"2016-03-04T17:34:09","modified_gmt":"2016-03-04T17:34:09","slug":"i-blame-bill-turnbull","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=376","title":{"rendered":"I Blame Bill Turnbull!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Alex doesn&#8217;t know this or at least he didn&#8217;t until now.\u00a0 Lol\u00a0 That when he leaves 40 minutes before I get up in a morning, I have a little bit of a languish between the sheets and\u2026Ok, I own up to it, I have a play with myself.<\/p>\n<p>It puts me in the right mood to get up and go to work.\u00a0 I wonder if they ever speculate about why I am always pleasant first thing in a morning at work.\u00a0 \ud83d\ude09\u00a0 Every girl should do it before they go to work, it changes your attitude for the whole day ahead.\u00a0 Well, perhaps it doesn&#8217;t last all day when that bastard in the office winds you up but you did try.<\/p>\n<p>So there I was this morning armed with my Cherry Nibbler, no more manual clit stimulations since I discovered that wonderful sex toy.\u00a0 Anyway\u2026I digress.\u00a0 I pushed the cover off and licked my right middle finger then ran it around my eager clit.\u00a0 It was already expectantly swelling for action.<\/p>\n<p>I forgot to turn off the BBC Breakfast News in my eagerness to be satisfied and lay back on the pillow after reaching in to my bedside drawer and retrieving my little battery operated assistant.\u00a0 \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n<p>I pressed the button on the base once and the familiar hum began and I shuffled in to the mattress to get a more comfortable position, parting my legs as I did so.\u00a0 I wet the rubber cup with my saliva and parted my pussy lips to aid placement over my needy clit.<\/p>\n<p>That felt good as I pushed the cup over my pink nub.\u00a0 One more press of the button and the speed increased creating a wave of stimulation over my sex.\u00a0 I could feel the tension ebb out of me as I pushed the button once more for the fastest constant speed, I was saving the pulse setting for when I was closer to coming.<\/p>\n<p>Just me and the gentle hum and then something broke through my hazy masturbatory mind\u2026.SCAT! resounded the normally reserved <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Bill_Turnbull\" target=\"_blank\">Bill Turnbulls<\/a>\u00a0voice\u2026I continued disbelieving my ears.\u00a0 Then again he said SCAT.\u00a0 I opened my closed eyes and focused on the screen.\u00a0 In the studio with him he had <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Cleo_Laine\" target=\"_blank\">Cleo Laine<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/John_Dankworth\" target=\"_blank\">John Dankworth<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>For those who have never heard of it before, it is a <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Scat_singing\" target=\"_blank\">jazz singing<\/a> style which encompasses some very strange words as quoted by Wikipedia bippity-bippity-doo-wop-razzamatazz-skoobie-doobie-bee-bop-a-lula-shabazz&#8221; is a very good example.\u00a0 Lol<\/p>\n<p>I now found myself giggling as I thought about other meaning for this, which is in simple terms &#8220;Poo Play&#8221;, I know it sounds gross.\u00a0 Now you can understand why I was completely put off my private wanking session thanks to Bill.\u00a0 The funniest thing about the whole interview was that he kept on repeating the word as if he knew the alternative meaning for it.<\/p>\n<p>Bill you are so naughty!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Alex doesn&#8217;t know this or at least he didn&#8217;t until now.\u00a0 Lol\u00a0 That when he leaves 40 minutes before I get up in a morning, I have a little bit &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/?p=376\" class=\"more-link\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/376"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=376"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/376\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19487,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/376\/revisions\/19487"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=376"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=376"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alexsuze.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=376"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}