Where Does the Kink Come From?
Does a relationship suddenly become kinky or does the kink slip into it slowly, over time? I think that depends on the relationship.
Suze and I have always been honest about our feelings and desires. Though not always kinky. We’re not that kinky now. So if you’re expecting to hear tales of our exploration of fisting, CBT and nipple torture then I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed.
What we have done is try new things that we both feel comfortable with and if we like them we keep doing them. Initially this was just simple stuff like handcuffs and rude food. Then of course there’s role playing. Surely everyone’s done a bit of that.
What really made our sex lives take off and venture from a fulfilling, but relatively vanilla course to an adventurous and seriously experimental way of thinking was blogging.
By adult blogging we have exposed ourselves to different outlooks and influences. We have been able to understand why some people get turned on by things that we would never have considered as erotic. That doesn’t mean that we find the same things arousing, but it does allow us an insight into the sexuality of others and therefore a new perspective into our own urges, fantasies and drives.
We couldn’t go back to our old way of thinking about sex, even if we wanted to. Adult blogging has changed the way our minds work. Or maybe it’s just unlocked the inner kink that was always there. If that’s the case then maybe everyone’s kinky at heart and they just need the right key to unlock that kinkiness?