Are They Doing What I Think They Are?

By | July 9, 2006

After my pub lunch and my gentleman flasher the other day I embarked on a little a little Suze-retrospective. I could not imagine some years ago being able to speak to my mother about a guy flashing his dinkle. It would have been too embarrassing.

As a youngster I had my own chair (always the one next to the television with the really crap view) which I could curl up in and watch programs. My parents would then just be able to see the back of my head and back. Which was really useful when there was anything saucy on the television. For some reason even though my Mum had taught me about sexual intercourse at an early age and not the birds and bees version, I still found it difficult to view anything remotely sexual in front of my parents.

The moment the scene would turn from dialogue to kissing I would sink down in to my chair and curl up so they could not see me, with a face as red as a cherry. I would stay tucked up in that position well until the scene finished even if I was bursting to go to the toilet. Which happened quite a lot, good job I had a strong bladder. LOL

This embarrassment didn’t kick in until I was old enough to stay up after 9pm at night and the programs were permitted to contain sexual content. The program didn’t even have to contain intercourse, it could be heavy petting and a quick grope and there I would go. I could feel my face burning up and my heartbeat increase. It was a completely different matter if they were not around. I was a lucky kid and had a small portable television, which I would sometimes watch in my room but was only allowed to view it until 10pm bedtime.

So like a good kid I would go to bed and sleep. Like yeh! You are joking. As soon as my mother disappeared downstairs after wishing me goodnight, on would go the television and down against the crack under the door would go my bathrobe. It was a must at weekends when there were horror films screened, they were good for some cleavage groping and a bit of slap and tickle.

It was a little difficult to watch the programs properly because most of the viewing had to be done with the sound down low or even off if my parents were wandering around outside my door. The programs were nowhere near as sexually explicit as they are today but they certainly satisfied my inquisitive mind.

Bloody hell, I just remembered I even got embarrassed watching wildlife programs with animals mating in them. The lions and apes were a nightmare to watch and don’t mention the elephants. Sometimes if I was really quick I could be out of the lounge door before they got down to it. I’m sure I could here the faint sounds of laughter as I quickly made my exit. I wonder if they were aware of my agitation. Come to think of it why did we watch so many wildlife programs. LOL

It’s funny but even to this day I find it difficult to watch a program containing sex scenes in front of my parents. I find myself speaking up and trying to distract them from the television screen. And I have an adult blog, how much more sexually aware can I be! Am I trying to have my parents believe that I don’t know how to fuck, if so why? Does anyone else feel the same? Is this a girl thing?