Nasty Sex – When Sex Goes Bad

We watched bloody awful program again last night which portrays itself as being educational on sexual practices and habits. And yet again we found ourselves feeling a mixture of emotions ranging from incredulous laughter through to annoyance at the steaming pile of bullshit it was dishing up as trendy sex ed.

The program must have been conceived either by school leavers with too much testosterone or someone high on crack because it couldn’t be further from reality.

It has successfully, week by week become more and more of a parody. And now I think has dropped to the level of experimentation with its audience. They have a common theme of giving people sexual terms and expressions to test their knowledge.

They certainly test me. Last nights helping included “zipper sex” in a way so self explanatory as not to be believable. Can anyone tell me if they have heard of this one. I’ll take my life in to my own hands and explain, it allegedly means fucking someone with your cock sticking out of your flies.

You getting the picture?!?!?

Ok, now I’ll give you time to recover before revealing the next one, the best one, the I don’t fucking believe you expect me to believe that one.

Are you ready?

What springs to mind when someone mentions doing the “monkey face? For me it is the moment of orgasm depicted on a man’s face as he comes. Correct me if I’m wrong.

Well, on the program it wasn’t that and you will never believe what they came out with. Now try not to laugh too loud, “It is the act of shaving all your pubes off and saving them (male) and then when you are ready to ejaculate you withdraw, come on your partner’s face and throw the hairs on to them.”

I thought I had just about heard it all when I made a discovery. According to urbandictionary.com this is correct. Now, either their researchers are gathering information about sexual practices from this unreliable reader updated source or they are making them up and adding them to UD.

You decide.

Either way you need to watch this prog shown on Sunday evenings at 10pm, it won’t educate you but it will make you laugh. 🙂