Sex Capisca?

“Someone who speaks several languages is multilingual. A person who speaks two languages is bilingual. But if you speak only one language you’re probably English.” Anon

It’s a constant source of shame to me that there is a certain section of English society that seems to think it’s acceptable not to even attempt to learn the language of a the country they are visiting. Almost without exception the rest of the world will learn English (or French, Spanish, Italian or German) to ensure they can communicate with people outside their country’s borders.

When I have been abroad I have always attempted to learn a few phrases out of plain courtesy. My appalling pronunciation has I’m sure amused waiters and shop staff across Europe, but has always been greeted with encouraging smiles and very often impeccable English from them in return.

The Internet makes things a little more difficult. Unlike when you are en vacance (eh! Did you see that a bit of French slipped in LOL) it’s possible to deal with people from any number of other countries in one day. For the most part I have to rely on their speaking and writing English.

There are however as I see it two universal languages. The first is maths because the greater part of the world subscribes to the same system of numerical and mathematical symbols.

The other is sex.

I know which I’d rather study for a degree in.

Turn down the soundtrack on a porn movie or life itself and the sex its obvious, compelling and unmistakable. From the stolen glance across a crowed restaurant to a primal fuck on the kitchen floor sex can be understood by everyone. It’s vocabulary is unmistakeable, its syntax infinitely sophisticated and yet at the same time utterly simplistic.

We all know it.

We all understand it.

We all have one language in common.

SEX!