The Sexual Department Store, Floor F

If there’s one thing that I remember from my childhood it’s the department store. In the UK they still exist, predominantly in the centre of town but while some still flourish it becoming increasingly difficult for them to compete with cheap clothing stores and out of town supermarkets.

What they offered is what the huge malls offer today, a huge range of goods that you couldn’t get at your local store all in one place. But for all their variety and acres of floor space they always lacked one thing. An adult department.

As the years have gone by these department stores have to a greater or lesser extent adapted nd embraced new trends and fashions and while still rooted in the past you can find some sexy undies and daring swimwear in most. What you will not find is a peep-hole bra and a display full of dildos.

Local by-laws aside surely it would reinvigorate these places to have a private, adult only area, not full of hard core DVDs but classy, quality sex toys at reasonable prices with knowledgeable sales staff. After all that’s what my parents used department stores for, getting advice about purchases from a trusted friendly faced shop assistant.

I know there would be objections from customers and revolts from shareholders and yet surely someone could give it a try. Are we developed enough as a society to accept this sort of store?

Nah probably not. We still force our sex shops down side streets, out of town and onto industrial estates unless they sanitise their stock lines to the most innocuous of goods or make everything pink and frilly.

One day maybe.