I don’t know why the artist decided to do this but this is just weird. Something about the placement of the boob …
… those crazy Japanese guys!
May 142012
May 102012
It’s difficult to move these days without falling over bisexual women. You talking about me? Lol Specifically I’m talking about celebrities. A cynic might say that pop stars and the sort of celebrities who are famous just for being famous have discovered that announcing that they are bisexual increases their public profile. It also means that many men suddenly feel an urge to take notice of them if they hadn’t before as thoughts of threesomes form in their minds.
I’m not saying that every celeb who announces their newly discovered sexuality is being disingenuous, that would be unfair and most probably inaccurate. However you don’t get to be a celeb without recognising a good publicity vehicle or having people around you that recognise one when they see it.
All this makes for great fantasy material for boys and girls alike. It provides the tabloid press with the column inches that makes a lazy journo’s life easy and creates a thousand smutty jokes and innuendos.
It occurs to me however that this bevy of beautiful bisexual birds is only half the story. Acceptance of female bisexuality is now gaining social acceptability. Girls are willing to experiment with it and even if their adventures into same sex relationships are flirtations and fun rather than a reflection of a fundamental aspect of their sexual preference they are more likely to dabble than ever before.
Would we be as accepting of male bisexuality? If a male actor or pop star announced they swung both ways would their career be adversely affected?
With a few exceptions such a revelation has in practice caused at least a pause in a star’s ascendance while their fan base adjusts and changes. Assimilating such information seems far more difficult when a man is involved and has a greater effect on society’s attitude towards them.
In extreme cases careers can be ended or stunted to such a degree that an individual is relegated to the “whatever happened to so-and-so” category.
Sexist, hypocritical, unfair? Yes it’s all of those things but sadly true.
May 062012
There’s a trend in this country, amongst a certain type of man, of a certain age, to seek out companionship in a certain way. A tiny number of women do it too but from what I have seen they form a tiny minority of the individuals involved in this activity.
I’m talking about Mail Order Brides. I’m not talking here about relationships that span cultures, nationalities or race, they are to be embraced. My best friend at Junior School was half Cambodian, his mother had been displaced while east and west fought ideological wars by proxy in the region in the 1960s.
I’m talking about middle aged to retirement aged men who have a bit of money in the bank and too much brash jewellery about their person. They tend to drive cars that are loud, both in terms of volume and styling. They have probably been married before and now as their hair lightens and thins, and the rest of their body heads south they seek to rejuvenate themselves, at least in their own eyes, and I suppose the eyes of their peers, by marrying a younger woman. The women tend to be from the Asia-Pacific region, though eastern Europe is now becoming a source of potential mates.
Again, this in itself is not a problem. If true feeling exists between two people involved in a relationship then age is pretty much irrelevant. There are certain practical issues whereby the life expectancy of one partner is way outside that of the other but then again who knows when our number is up? Fate could snatch us away at any time and it’s the time we spend together not the time we spend apart in a relationship that should matter.
I mean I’m guessing here at the motivation I suppose, because the whole idea of literally importing a human being from thousands of miles away from a country whose culture is different and language is alien is anathema to me. It smacks of human trafficking or even slave trading. No I’m not saying the women are treated like slaves or abused.
The argument in favour seems to be that the women (and they tend to be quite young women from the ones I’ve encountered) are willing participants in the trade. They send money back to their extended family and therefore gain from the deal. There it is you see, deal. It’s a commercial transaction not a relationship. While I can see that an impoverished family would benefit from the arrangement it’s based around a financial transaction. Do we regard this as an extended dowry? Is the girl a long-term-hire escort? Or is it a form of permanent prostitution.
I suppose after a time, when the females involved have learned English (while there is a range of language skills many have only the rudiments of English) and got to know the men they have committed to they may fall in love. That’s great, but being isolated by a language barrier and forced to rely on their new husband for communication and support means they are bound to stay with that man. Maybe they don’t feel like this but to me it looks like a prison of circumstance created by the arrangement they have chosen to become involved in.
I’d like to think, for the sake of the women involved that they are content, or as content as they have been conditioned to believe they can be. I just can’t see it though, am I too traditional in my attitude towards relationships? Apparently so. While writing this piece I found a US law firm which specialises in advising US citizens on obtaining a visa for their new bride, the senior partner is pictured on the website’s front page with a beautiful Thai woman in a western style wedding dress hanging off his arm.
May 042012
I came across this article from four years ago about the changes which take place when a couple settle down into a stable relationship. It would appear that the physiological changes mirror what everyone who has had a long term relationship already knows. The initial flush of excitement and passion becomes deeper and more subtle – the wildness of those first few months fades but is replaced by something stronger, more intense and if you are lucky more enduring.
My own conclusion from this is that when it comes to people with a predisposition to infidelity they must either be addicted to the chemical signature of early relationships or are just complete bastards. OK, OK, I know some relationships don’t work out but there are serial philanderers out there who either seek out partners for a quick thrill and nothing else or can’t find it in themselves to form a long term bond.
Some of this may be chemical/hormonal in origin, so I do have a bit of sympathy for them (though more for their cuckolded partners), but even if this is the case surely they must see the wreckage they leave behind when their partner – who may be unaware of their compulsion to stray – is suddenly dumped. Relationships are complex things and if you body is playing tricks on you that might go part of the way to explaining the complexity. You can never fully rationalise love and passion, thank goodness, I mean where would be the fun in that.
But if your body is genuinely incapable of making the transition from the first flush of passion to a deeply fulfilling long term relationship then not being able to control that must be a real burden.
May 022012
Jacqueline Pearce’s portrayal of Servalan is still regarded by many people as the sexiest thing to come out of the BBC in the early eighties. Jacqueline’s powerful and driven President of Earth is unremittingly self-serving, ruthless and regards her sexuality as simply another tool in the armoury that put her in charge of the entire planet in the first place.
Little wonder that I remember her saying once in an interview that some of her fan mail was a little sexual in nature. To some she was and possibly still is the ultimate dominatrix in that she wielded power over all the men on the planet and she was totally unattainable, being a character of fiction set in the far future. Even if she had been real and you had been around in the year 3xxx she would have crushed you like a bug. LOL
I thought I’d look her up as I remember the series Blake’s 7 with a huge amount of fondness from my childhood. It was full of great stories, good and bad acting and very wobbly sets courtesy of a budget that would make modern TV programme makers roar with laughter.
You can read Jacqueline’s blog on her site, here.
Apr 302012
How many times have sex toys been the subject of schoolboy sniggers? How often have women giggled at the prospect of touching yet alone using a vibrator?
Now things are changing. I’m not saying that sex toys are the normal topic of conversation for everyone or that any occasion is appropriate to bring up the subject of self-pleasure but it’s surprising how often sex toys come up in my life.
I’m not talking here about the online, adult, sex toy testing side of my life – the other bit. The bit where I work in an office, deal with clients in non-adult businesses and communicate in a pretty “normal” way with those around me. It happens from time to time that the subject of sex and sex toys arises. The majority of occasions it’s in the context of a joke, not “Oh I got this great vibrator the other day …” and that’s exactly what made me write this post.
However unlike other occasions the circumstances of the incident highlighted just how far we’ve come.
I was passing through the reception area of one of my client’s buildings when I noticed the receptionist was in fits of giggles. Her wireless mouse had stopped working and she had rung to the main office to see if they had any AA batteries. Their reaction had been to suggest she wanted to use them for her vibrator and that she had run them down amusing herself because it had been a quiet morning.
If the conversation on the phone had been between two “Sex And The City” types 20s to 40s maybe, and they had kept it to themselves it wouldn’t have been so notable. But the receptionist is easily old enough to be my mother and she chose to tell me about it. Twice!
Don’t get me wrong I find it refreshing that a mature woman can talk openly about sex toys to a guy many years her junior. OK, I know she didn’t tell me how she preferred to use them but it did open my eyes.
Suze and I are often reminding ourselves that we are now part of the adult industry and that we have to be careful when making assumptions about what is and isn’t acceptable in normal society. It’s so easy to assume that because you can discuss sex toys or porn when at an adult event or business meeting that the wider world has the same open and accepting attitude. Porn is lagging behind sex toys, there’s something about the graphic depiction of sex, often adventurous sex that is less palatable to the non-adult-involved public.
And yet sex toys are perhaps more intimate. Sex in a movie is at its most basic simply a documenting of the human activity of copulation – sex toys are implicitly linked with self-pleasure, an activity that is taboo in many societies and religions.
Yes, you could argue that the purpose of pornography is to aid masturbation although many couples watch pornography together.
The world is changing people – keep up!
Apr 292012
Dirty Sanchez is a possible apocryphal sexual practice that allegedly involves smearing the upper lip of your partner with faeces while they are performing oral sex on you. Not everyone’s cup of tea and like I said many people will tell you it doesn’t happen.
However while I can’t see the attraction myself I will reiterate what I have said on many occasions – I’ve read enough about sex and sexual predilections to know that this particular variant of Coprophilia is far less strange than some of the stuff I’ve seen.
Apr 252012
Sometimes your kinkiest desires can be difficult, impractical or just plain messy.
Baby oil is one such bit of naughtiness. Beyond a few squirts and a bit of erotic massage you enter into a scenario that requires a huge sheet of polythene, towels and a carefully planned root to the shower. Without such careful preparation you’ll end up with strange marks on the carpet and a potentially disastrous fall on the bathroom floor.
I speak from experience here. We have done the baby oil thing and it was great. The foreplay was fantastic, fun and extremely slippery, like two eels trying to grab and grope one another. Sex was almost impossible and after some struggling involved us wrapping our limbs around and behind each other to lock me into position so I could thrust. It worked, just, but resulted in us creeping along the polythene sheet every time I pushed into Suze. A real laugh but because of the time required not the sort of thing that you do every day.
Food fetish can be like that too. In fact that’s what kicked me off on this train of thought. For some reason my mind drifted to thoughts of golden syrup rolling over Suze’s chest, dripping from her nipples.
While visually appealing and great for a couple of short licks, if she were covered in syrup I’d soon become sticky and feel sick. The appeal of honey-glazed breasts would wane and I’d be dragging her off to the shower for a shower and a shag.
Some things are best left in the realms of erotic art and fantasy fiction no matter how appealing they first appear.
Apr 232012
Being an adult toy tester and reviewer I’m frequently approached via social media and email to give my advice on the best sex toys to purchase from a sex toy store. I’m loath to give my opinion on what brings me off because I’m not the person they are enquiring for.
This question is a difficult one to answer because a toy that works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another. We all have different levels of sensitivity and sexual preferences which influence our choice in sex toys.
When deciding on which toy is best for your needs there are several considerations, after all your choice of stimulation is based upon your personal desires and preferences and not those of others as I explained earlier.
Firstly give consideration to the kind of stimulation you are looking for. For example do you get off on clitoral stimulation, vaginal penetration or anal play? You may have answered yes to all and I’m sure there is a sex toy which will fulfil your needs.
Personally I find that clitoral stimulation is very intense and gives me much more of a rush than vaginal but combine the two and I find my own personal Nirvana. However, too much clitoral stimulation can be quite uncomfortable as like the male genitalia it becomes quite sensitive after the first orgasm.
Additionally for me I like to have my G spot stimulated, so vibrators with curved tips are wonderful as they target the frontal wall of the vagina where the G spot resides. These types of vibes can also be good for clitoral stimulation by the very nature of the angled tip they have. 
Another consideration is the type of material you enjoy best. Whilst silicone is soft and almost flesh-like it doesn’t have the thermal properties of glass which can be warmed or cooled under the running tap. Glass is also excellent for lube retention as it’s not porous and will work with any lubricant of your choice.
Additionally you may choose a wooden sex toy, whilst there aren’t many of these on the market they do tend to be very attractive as pieces of art in their own right and warm quickly to the bodies temperature. I’ve reviewed just a hand full of these sex toys and found them to be useful as well as great to look at.
You can find a great range of toys at a quality online adult store, the choice is yours.
My next consideration would be vibrations or not? Vibrations add to the stimulation provided by the toy’s shape and ultimately the performance you can expect but they may not be practical in households where there are children or guests within close proximity of the walls of your bedroom! In this instance a dildo type sex toy is probably best advised for privacy and ease of use.
All of the above should be considered before you make a purchase from your online sex shop and you will find the perfect implement of pleasure for your needs.
Apr 212012
I’m not so much a screamer in bed but I do like to vocalise my appreciation of Alex’s ministrations by moaning, the occasional phrase and grunt. All this comes quite natural but I do have a level of awareness during sex and do try to moderate appropriately.
We are adjoined to the house next door so we can’t be too loud in the bedroom but if they go out then all hell breaks loose. Lol No, if they go out nextdoor it’s nice to have the freedom to make as much noise as we like and view our naughty DVD’s without having to lower the volume.
I’m as aware as the next person that having noisy neighbours is not a good thing and if continually affected by their disruptions you can have some serious mental health issues to deal with. Very much on par with some forms of torture in that the continual disruption and in some cases disturbed sleep can make people ill.
Right off my soapbox and back to what I was about to tell you. I just read an article in today’s press about a couple who have been instructed by their local council not to have sex between 7pm & 10am, you can read the full story here.
I’m not sure how I would feel if the council started telling me when I could have sex, how about you?
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