Would You Fuck The Vacuum Cleaner?
Suze and I have written before about our lack of love for fucking machines as featured on a number of specialist sites. The concept of a mechanical device of such complexity, cost and almost brutal application of sexual stimulation doesn’t sit well with either of us.
I have to concede that there will come a day when sex machines do become a part of our lives but not in the crude and unsophisticated form that they exist today. I think that people in general could easily accept a fucking machine in human form. For those of us outside a relationship or who simply do not want to have a relationship they would offer sexual fulfilment without strings and allow anyone to fulfil their fantasies without going through that tiresome process of finding a compatible mate.
That sounds terribly cynical but imagine the sort of situations that a cybernetic sex partner would be far more desirable than a real human. If you loose your partner of 40 years you might feel that to woo another partner and then sleep with them would be full of emotional pitfalls and potential heartbreak for you both. There’s also the matter of not wanting to feel that you have betrayed your life-partner by finding someone else. With a synthetic lover you would be simply fulfilling a need and not trying to replace your soul mate. Not for everyone but an option nonetheless.
You could also try out things your partner might not be in to and get it out of your system. I suppose this is a more controversial statement to make but think about it. If you try it with your synthetic partner and you like it but you still can’t get your partner to join in then maybe you’ve got the wrong partner. However if you find it doesn’t really float your boat then nobody gets hurt. Of course the two downsides to this are if you want to try something really weird and you like it or if you persists in doing the stuff your partner will not try with your cyber sex toy while maintaining your relationship with your human partner – is that being unfaithful or just plain deceitful.
Whatever you do and whatever technology throws up in the future there will be a lot of new ethical, social and emotional issues to address and all that on top of where you charge up your electric love pal.
uh . . . well . . . uhmmm
alex, i am not sure what exactly led you to write that headline, but i have some thoughts on the subject. i am going to start at the end and end at the beginning. OK?
i have mixed feelings about fucking a droid. i am an old school kind of guy and i require emotions, or at least feelings, before i do the do with a lady. i learned early in life about this when i mistakenly fucked a lady named leticia. you see, she offered, and i was lonely and i had not gotten laid for what seemed like years. i thought it would be fine, but it was anything but fine after i finished. i could not leave her place fast enough, and even had to promise i would be right back. i made some lame excuse about having to to down to the drug store to get a prescription. young and dumb.
unfortunately, that pissed leticia off. she showed up at my work place wearing a bizarre cowgirl outfit, complete with boots, short skirt, vest, straw hat, and two six shooter cap guns strapped around her waist. she fired off the guns, shouted Yahoo, and demanded to see me. fortunately someone ran interference long enough for me to hide in the kneehole of my desk until after she left. the shame and horror of that remains to this day.
now we get to the beginning. for some unknown reason it occurred to me one day that it would be a good thing to stick my little boy dick into the end of the vacuum cleaner hose. i do not know why this strange idea appeared in my head, but it did. and i did stick my tiny dick onto that black opening that was whooshing in air. i am not ashamed to admit that it was indeed a very good idea because it felt great. in fact, i had my first orgasm sunk two or three inches into a kenmore vacuum cleaner hose.
this was in the days before i could ejaculate and also before i learned through other strange experimenting that i could make myself feel good using my right hand. that was great to learn because my hand was much quieter than the vacuum cleaner, and i did not have to wait until mother left the house to use my hand. soon the vacuum cleaner was left to clean the floors, and besides, the stream of exhaust air had a bad smell to it that my hand certainly lacked.
i suppose that while admitting to the weirdness of my early ways i have to also admit that i thought the hose was so damnedwonderful i tried to get a friend interested in using his mother’s vacuum cleaner. that did not go so well for me and i quickly learned that discretion often is the better part of valor.
now that i am older and have a man dick that is larger than my vacuum cleaner hose I am safe from the temptations of mechanical sex. oh god, but once every two or three years, when i am at the car wash vacuuming my floor mats, i see the huge opening to that hose, and my mind drifts back to younger years… not that i would ever stick my man dick into a pay per use vacuum cleaner hose at the gas station.
well, i am glad to have gotten all of that off my chest now, and sincerely hope that the future will have less perversion in it than the past.
weird