First Anal
I wrote a few days ago about how anal sex has become a staple of the heterosexual pornography we all consume, where once it was seen as a predominantly homosexual activity.
Like all porn, anal sex in porn is devoid of context. Even vaginal porn requires that performers clean-up, shave and lube-up to ensure that the camera gets a great shot and the viewer watches an apparently effortless transition from “Hi, I’m the pool cleaner” to “Oh yes, fuck me with that big cock …”.
Porn seems to be much easier to believe that other types of televisual entertainment. I think this because when you watch porn your intellectual processes are just ticking over (for the most part) and your instincts are running the show. If a drama were to take such liberties with the truth and basic practicalities you’d be shouting at the screen and demanding to know why the producers of the programme thought any one would believe it.
This is in part why porn has lead to a drastic and in some cases unwelcome shift in the way that people, mainly men, view sex and sexual acts. Women find more and more demanded of them and men seem to think it’s OK to demand some things of women that previously would have required a long and understanding relationship where mutual sexuality was explored over time.
The most potentially hazardous effect of this is porn’s depiction of anal sex.
There are a number of biological facts that mean anal sex requires relaxation, understanding and lots of lube. Porn shows anal sex as a regular and spontaneous part of sexual congress. However, even amongst couples who enjoy anal sex it is often not the staple of their sexual menu and requires planning beforehand.
Do’s for anal sex include douching, lubrication and care. Don’ts include switching between anus and vagina during sex, switching partners and vigorous arse fucking.
The anus doesn’t open wide and immediately allow a cock inside unless a relaxing agent has been used, or your sphincters are physically damaged. Being fucked hard up the ass is something that only a minority of people actually enjoy and can cause medical complications that can range from haemorrhoids to prolapsed colons and worse.
Anal sex can be enjoyed but it takes more than a Pepperoni With Cheese and a clichéd pickup line to do so.
Hardly an objective piece!
Firstly, there is significant evidence that the wide availability of porn reduces the likelihood that people will commit unacceptable acts.
Yes, there is a much higher awareness of anal sex than even even a couple of years and yes, this has led to many people trying it, and yes, many people who try it without forethought have been turned off it forever. However many people have also found anal sex to be an important an ongoing part of their sex life and there are even het couples who do anal sex most or all the time.
The emergence of female educators like haves done much to counter the problems you describe.
There are many gay men and increasing number of women who will testify that regular vigorous anal sex is not only not harmful but can even contribute to anal health.
I’m not denying the sort of problems you describe. In an atmosphere of sexual freedom there will always be people who abuse that freedom and take an inconsiderate approach to their partners and, for that matter, their own sexual needs. However, if you’re going to comment please take a more balanced approach.
DG
DG
You may regard the piece as subjective, but then this is a blog. As I said about porn out of context, reading a post outside of the rest of what’s been written here will not give you a true picture of our views.
In all honesty I think you should read the post again and I think you would then pickup that this is about the differences between media fiction and the reality of anal in a relationship.
“Porn seems to be much easier to believe that other types of televisual entertainment.”
Really Alex? By whom? People who believe that all men are hung like Trigger and all women answer their door in crotchless panties with jugs the size of the national debt, while all nipples point to true north and that every random encounter between two people results in hard fucking.
“I think this because when you watch porn your intellectual processes are just ticking over (for the most part) and your instincts are running the show.”
Watch “Scrubs” or “Jerry Springer”, neither bastions of verisimilitude that require higher order mental function and you realize that like porn, television is watched for entertainment and release, albeit of a different sort.
I agree with you about anal requiring increased attention to hygiene and sensitivity to your lover’s wishes. Some “receivers” like it gentle, others can take it rough after a point, others won’t take it at all. For the reasonable viewer, the only real insight from anal porn is that anal is no longer strictly the province of gay love, but can be part of healthy hetero sex play. In a healthy relationship, there’s no such thing as demand, if the receiver doesn’t consent.
Unreasonable partners will do what they do, whether they’re fans of “First Anal” or the first season of “Cheers.” If their demands cause their lovers unwanted pain, they won’t or shouldn’t be invited back for reruns.
Afraid I have to side with DG. The reasonable viewer isn’t that gullible and should understand or soon pick up that anal porn is not sex education or some twisted take on reality, but media fiction and entertainment. My sympathies lie with the “receivers” who feel they have to submit tortuous assplay to make a buck or keep a bad relationship going. Saying rough anal video contributes to unsafe anal practice in real life is like saying that noncon entertainment leads to rape in real life.
The reasonable viewer takes even the roughest porn for what it is. Fiction and entertainment. I’d like to believe that a majority of the 50 million who watch porn know the difference.