Moving With Sex Toys
One of the logistical problems of being in the sex toy reviewing business is that whenever anyone comes round you have to make sure the house is clear of adult objects. We’ve mentioned this before on more than one occasion when friends or family have knocked on the door unannounced and caused us to scrabble frantically around the place to “sanitise” our home for the majority of people who do not know what we do.
Moving house only made this worse. Despite paying for the removal company to pack all our stuff for us we had to find and pack all the adult stuff first. That isn’t just the sex toys and the lubricant it’s also the R18 DVDs and erotic literature too. This stuff was moved by me rather than the removal guys, just in case they dropped a box and had a “spillage”.
All that was fine but despite having heavily edited the stuff in our house we still have a lot of possessions. So now, several weeks after the move we still have possessions we can’t find, ranging from dusters to dildos, pepper pots to hard code porn. This is even after I thought I had chosen a suitably discrete euphemism for the toys “Suze’s hardware” and “Alex’s hardware”. Still can’t find half of the boxes stuffed full of sex toys.
So be warned, when you move take care with your clit vibes and look after your lube, or you may never see it again.
Thanks for the laugh. I helped a friend move once and she told me to go just start grabbing boxes. One of the ones I grabbed was open a little (because she had not finished packing it.) So here I am looking at this foot long, maybe more, double ended dildo. The side of the box was marked, “Exercise equipment”. I close the box before she got back and moved another one. Later on that night, at dinner with her parents (no, we are not a couple… not that I would have complained.) I mentioned: “Your daughter is quite the athelete. I ran into a box of her exercise equipment and she has a pretty nice collection. I am thinking about working out with her.”
The fun part was watching her turn pale and then red as she started staring daggers at me. I about pissed my pants when her father said, “THat sounds good, Honey, maybe I’ll join you two.”